Afghanistan Diary

Epilogue

2005-07-30T21:34:00.000+04:30

I took this blog offline for a while because I inadvertently emailed the link to somebody to whom it was not intended.

I have been back in New Mexico for almost ten days now. Things are not going too badly. I reconcilled with Ilene and I live at her house. Things are going well. We went camping for a few days, then we headed for Pegosa Springs in Colorado. Only slightly difficult part is that we currently only have one car and she works at night, but I will get a car soon. In fact, I will buy her car and she will buy a new car. The dogs were thrilled to see me.

Workwise, it looks like it will be easier to get a job locally than I imagined. I have been offered a nice, well-paying job the day after my return, however, I am still waiting for the background investigation to be completed. Since I am a little nervous it might fail, I am still interviewing for others positions. I have at least three interviews next week (I have had three interviews so far). Joblessness does not suit me, I find. All the time I was in Kabul, it seemed like I couldn't managed to get stressed enough. Nowadays, I am stressed. I dislike situations where there is nothing you can do but wait. I spend a fair amount of my time brushing on my computer skills (Java, PL/SQL) in preparation for my interviews.

It feels a little strange to be back, but overall it is easy. I just feel a little out of sink with the world surrounding me sometimes.

Oh, just one more things. I had the pleasure to have lunch with my former collleagues yesterday. They told me about another blogg that talks about me and teased me about my drug habits. I was a little surprised. I understand now, the blog must be Babak's who talks about the Hash House Harriers. However, the HHH is a "drinking society with a running problem" as they like to call it (there is one in Albuquerque as well) and despite its name it has absolutely nothing to do with cannabis, it is just a group of folks who go hicking or running and drink beers afterwards.

I may continued this blog (if so, I should probably change its name) although, not being in Kabul, I may not have that many interesting things to say in it.

Dubai continued

2005-07-16T20:46:00.000+04:30

In the afternoon, I went to the city museum, the covered bazaar and to Dubai creek. None of them struck me as especially worthwhile. Still, I had good Indian food, and smoking a sheesha while watching the boats was rather nice. Weather is approaching 40c, and it is hot and sticky.

Looks like I may have a chance to do some contract work when I get home. One of the opportunities has to do with Java programming. I am very tempted in so far as I really want to become a proficient Java programmer, on the other hand, my experience with Java is so small as to be insignificant. Still, I know the theory (I have been studying Java for a long time) and I know some C# which is Java under a different name (and a different API). Maybe it is the time to jump?

I did buy myself a summer suit for my job hunting. Some people I know will make fun of me because of its color (very light yellow), but I don't care. I just hope I don't look like a televangelist in it (for some reason they always wear impeccable suits in funky colors).

Dubai

2005-07-16T12:07:00.000+04:30

I arrived in Dubai last night. Going from the airport to the city in an air-conditionned car (our Kabul car had no AC), driving in an orderly manner, passing these large empty avenues, not smelling or hearing much felt really strange and actually rather sad. The big stores with neon signs everywhere made made the place looks like a muslim version of America. I am getting a sense that it will take me a little while to readapt.

I don't have a guide so I wasn't sure what to do in Dubai (there is not that much to do at any rate). I took a taxi to a computer tower to check out the price of Pocket PCs, but it did not strike me as cheaper than in the US. I did see very cheap brand name suits on the other hand, and I might let myself buy one.

This afternoon, I will try to visit the old covered bazaar. My flight takes off early in the morning (1:45) so I have many hours to kill. Physically, I am feeling ok but my right hand shakes like crazy.

Last ... in Kabul

2005-07-16T11:50:00.000+04:30

During my last days in Kabul, I discovered a few places of interest. The first was the UNICA, UN's guest house. It is possible to get a membership there and they have nice sport facilities and a bar. More importantly, they have a swimming pool, used by a number of young women, which makes the UNICA the best chick gazing place in Kabul.

The other place was teh Copa Cubana, a club located near my favorite restaurant in Kabul, Shandiz. The area is pretty safe, although it must be said that there was a rocket attack in the viccinity last week or so. We were not quite sure what to expect. I was vaguely hoping for a cuban estaurant with a dance floor and tasteful latin music. Actually there was nothing cuban about the place, and the music (hip hop) was no exception. The place was run by Afghan Americans, allthough the bouncer looked more like a buff gay italian. The Copa Cubana defintely features on my list of places where to go at least once. It was an actual club, with smoke, bar, stroboscopic lights and people dancing in sleevless shirts. It was just so strange to see that in Kabul.

Driving through the city at night, it is difficult not to be stuck by the unmber of brothels that have sprung through the city. They operate quite openly with lights (think Christmas lights) all over the facades and a sign such as "Silk Road." Not even "silk Road Restaurant," just "silk Road." Given that most of these signs are in English, I imagine that the clientele is made off the many male contractors and soldiers stationned here.

Another place I visited recently, that has a great view of Kabul is TV hill, so called because around there are all the broadcasting antennas for the city. The area is still partly mined, so don't go off the beaten path and watch your steps.

Last day at work

2005-07-14T10:33:00.000+04:30

Today is my last day at work. I am in a very pissy mood and I do little to hide it. One reason for this is that my boss had set a deadline last week for everyone to submit to me a list of amends to make to my softwares. What did I not receive yesterday afternoon and late this morning? A list of amends, one week late, 24 h before I leave. I could have strangled the guy, although, thinking about it, I might have derived more pleasure in repeatedly bashing his head against the monitor. I mulled over both possibilities at length. To make things worse, my boss sided with the person submitting the list 24h late and she accused me to spend all my time working on Pocket PCs. That really pissed me off, because I worked on that project almost exclusively during evenings and week-ends. It is bad enough that I never got the least support from management to do that kind of things (not that I expect kudos, but some acknowledgement would be nice), but now I am actually getting penalized for it. I gave her a piece of my mind in an email (she is out of town) and haven't heard from her since, which is probably not a good thing.

At the end of the day, I realize that I feel very unsupported and unappreciated at work and I know that I am not the only person to have such feelings. It is hard to work in these conditions.

I leave DACAAR in very good terms with my peers, my immediate supervisor and with the water supply unit (the folks with whom I have been working with my gps). With my actual boss, things are a little more tense.

Today there was a festive lunch organized to mark the fact it was a colleage's last day and mine. However scripted these occassions are, it was really nice of them to do so. They also gave me a turban as a present, which no doubt, will make quite an impression in Albuquerque. :) What is even nicer is that they organized a little shisha party tonight.

Leendert, the manager of the water supply unit has ask if he could buy my toys. I sold him the whole setup: pocket pc, gps, bluetooth adaptor, software, etc. Equipment can be hard to find here and in this way, he is sure that everything is setup and working.

Tomorrow, I am off to Dubai, then a long ride to New Mexico. I have a job interview when I arrive, then I'll go on a little camping trip. I did not get the job I interviewed for at the University, btw.

On butchers and more...

2005-07-03T08:10:00.000+04:30

Today as I went to lunch, I walk passed a few butcher stalls. As is often the case, one of the stall had a large furry carcass hanging from a pole, more or less in the shade, while its headless end was dragging on the floor. Next to it was a living cow. When I came back from lunch, the later was gone. Where did it go?

There are many flocks of sheep going through the city here. I don’t know if you have had the opportunity to look at a sheep up close, but they have the most ridiculous oversized buttocks, moving back and forth as they walk. I mention this because somebody told me that in parts of Afghanistan, sheep buttocks are a treat given to honored guests. Having heard of so many strange and disgusting foods given to honored guests in various parts of the world, I wonder though, how many of these were just locals have a little fun at the expense of foreigners.

I had my job interview yesterday and it left me puzzled and disappointed. It is not that I did badly, I think, but it was nothing like I expected. I imagined that the interview would be roughly 1/3 technical questions (which I could answer well), 1/3 project management question (which I can at least talk my way through) and a 1/3 personal questions of the type “What are your strengths and weaknesses?” Instead, there was at most 25% of technical and project management questions combined and the rest was just really flakey stuff, like “Give a specific example of a situation where you convinced somebody to adopt your point of view.”

I answered as I could, but there is no good or wrong answer to these questions so I find it impossible to say how well I did. Truth be told, I am a little put off now. I am not sure I still want this job so badly. The other thing is that the job deals largely (not exclusively though) with ColdFusion and I am fed up to code in CFML, I have done it for too long. I haven’t heard from any other job I applied for.

I have been interviewing for my replacement at work. So far, all expats candidates have turned down the offer on the ground that the salary was too low, and the afghan candidates have have salary expectations that are way above what DACAAR initially intended to pay (and for that matter they are also above what I get paid). I really did not come here for the money, but somehow this does not make me feel good.

I am still hoping for it, but I don’t think that I will be able to go to Peshawar or Islamabad before I go. Next week-end is my last in Kabul and I need it to finish my gps-c#-pocket pc project. I may take an extra day off to buy gifts and souvenirs, etc.

heat

2005-06-29T08:04:00.000+04:30

Kabul is getting hot. Temperature is about 40 Celcius, very dry. That wouldn't be so bad but we don't have any air conditionning to speak off so by the end of the day, I feel sticky and smelly. The worse thing about the heat though, is the stench of improvised garbage dumps and that of the open sewers brewing under the sun. Still I wouldn't trade this weather for the bitter cold we had last winter.

I started getting into my leaving mode. I keep making a mental list of all the things to do and buy before my departure (gifts, souvenirs). Only a little over two more weeks! Workwise, I finished one of the two projects my boss wants me to complete before I go. I am kicking myself hard to finish the other one which strikes me as pointless and dull. In addition, I have been working hard on my gps-pda-c# project for data gathering in the field. I am glad to report, it is going well, I may even be able to have a working prototype by this week-end. I even started to compile a comprehensive windows help file for it.

I bought a large quantity of pirated software (market value: $50k?) and I am mildly worried that it might get me in trouble at the US custom. I may try to find another way to send them.

I booked my flight and I will spend a day in Dubai. Since I haven't been there and I have a day to spend, I think it will be more interesting in Dubai than in Kabul. I have been told that it is insufferably hot and not to expect walking around in the city.

Today, I am saying goodbye to Lyn, who is travelling to Australia and won't be back before my departure. :( It is rather sad to think that I may never seen some of the people I met here again. According to my experience, you always get to see some people though.

Last week

2005-06-27T08:03:00.000+04:30

Last week-end, we went on a trip. Hafiz, the driver with whom we went to Mazar a few months back, invited us to see his family.

We first went to Iskalef, a small town renowed for its ceramics (we bought a few), then to his house which was located not far from there. Hafiz stays in Kabul during the week and come home on the week-end. The extended family lives in the house. It goes without saying that we did not get to see any women. We met three of his brother, the most interesting of which is a former mudjahedeen turned gardener and also quite a pothead. He made a beautiful garden. He was a little upset that we immediately pointed out the cannabis plant "all these flowers and you need to point out the cannabis plant!" Afghans love their flowers it seem and people take real pride in them. Close to the garden was a dirty pound which up to twenty years ago was the only source of water. Today however, they have a well (possibly made by DACAAR).

We ate lunch with the brothers and the father, afgham style, that is on the floor with our hands. As is often the case in muslim countries, the youngest brother got to do all the work. I hope that the women in the house had food of their own. I am saying this because I once ate with a very conservative kurdish family and as I was going for a second serving, my friend wispered to me to leave some food for the women, since they got to eat what the men's left.

Hafiz is a very nice guy, he tried his best to speak Dari in a way that we could understand (my dari really sucks but I understand a little. To put it more positively, I have advanced guessing skills).

After lunch, we went back to the garden and everybody enjoyed his favorite drugs (we brought some vodka). I thought I handled mine really well, until I spoke the wrong language to my companions and had the greatest difficulties in putting on my shoes.

On the way back, we stopped at one of Hafiz's friend house. The man, owned quite a bit of land. He had four fives (he was separated from one and looking to replace her) and eighteen children! It is not so much a house as a village really. The thing that was sad is that one of his kids was death-mute and I can't see how, in that context he will ever learn how to speak, read or for that matter, how he will ever go to school.

The man also had a horse with whom he plays buzkashi and two fighting dogs. He was very concerned to keep a safe distance between us and the dog. Perhaps he has seen what they can do. One of them (a bull with many scars on its face ) looked friendly though.

It has been a shamefully long time that I haven't written and this story is already pretty old. Truth is I haven't got that much to say. My boss is cracking the whip at the moment and I struggle to finish my lousy assignment. I also work on my pda-gps data gathering project. It is working well, but there is still work left to do. I have been working all this week-end but at least I finished one of the two project my boss buggs me about. I am hoping that the user did not say it was complete just because they were too lazy to actually test them.

I will try to spend a long week-end in Peshawar or Islamabad soon. I was thinking of stopping over in Pakistan for a few days on my way to New Mexico, but I checked the itinerary and it did not make sense. The only affordable trip through Pakistan I saw had seven connections, all pretty tight. No thanks. I will have to go through Dubai. I am debating whether or not to stop. It does not strike me as an interesting destination, but on the other hand, I have never been.

I am starting to be in a mood to go back to New Mexico. I have a phone interview for a job this coming monday.

2005-06-16T12:15:00.000+04:30

Not much to report lately. We are still under curfew, so our movements are limited. A week ago, Clementina (the abducted Italian aid worker) was released. There are conflicting stories about her release, but it appear that what the police did is to keep the mother of the kidnapper (aidworkernapper I should say) in jail until Clementina was free. All along, they had known who did it. Although there has been some Islamic demands made such as that of a ban on the sale of alcohol and a stricter crackdown on opium cultivation (how do you measure that?), it had been said that the she was abducted by a criminal gang who intended to exchange her for one of their members who is currently in jail.

The security situation is not improving however. Among the long list of incident in the country, there was an abduction attempt (or something that looks like it) in Kabul. We have had two security meetings this week. The first was to discuss security measures and the evacuation plan. I had to register with the Belgian embassy, which I hadn’t done. The second was a meeting on security and stress to discuss how we cope with the current situation. Prior to the meeting, I would have said that my level of stress was very low (too low really, I cannot get stressed enough). However, according to some test given to us, I have all the signs of somebody on the verge of a major burnout.

I heard back from my attorney, but the answer was not what I was hoping for. What is especially irritating is that it is not a yes or no answer, as I expected. I am still debating the matter, but I am currently leaning toward going back to the States. Even if I stay, I will need to pay a visit to the States for immigration purposes. My boss, who is concerned that some of my projects are taking too long, said that she might help me with the cost of the plane ticket if I managed to finish some them beforehand. “Think of it as a carrot,” she said. The thing is: I don’t like to think of myself as a donkey.

This week-end, we have some outing planned with Hafiz, the driver with whom we went to Mazar. Also there is a circus in town that we really would like to see. We went there last week-end, but the show was cancelled due to bad weather. The circus has no animal, it has a frighteningly old equipment for trapezists. The tent, or what is left of it, appears to be made out of rags. To say that the circus is shabby does not capture, the advance stage of decay it is in. It would not be out of place in a post-apocalyptic movie. I will post pictures soon.

Herat

2005-06-06T08:12:00.000+04:30

Sorry for not posting much recently, I was travelling. My boss thought I had been in Kabul for too long (I concurred) and she sent me to Heart for a days. There were two purposes to the trip. The first was to visit the city, but equally important for me was to be able to go to the field. I joined DACAAR to be part of the organization and sitting in front of my computer, it is easy to loose track of what it does. I think every expat, perhaps even every employee should go on field trips.

Compared to Kabul, Herat comes across as a smaller, less chaotic, cleaner city with large avenues and many trees. Kabul has a few parks, but otherwise, you'd be hard pressed to find a green area. It is dirt everywhere. There are many flocks of sheep and goats within the city and the poor animals have nothing to graze on but piles of garbage (need I specify that there are no garbage collection in Kabul?). Heart has the reputation to be a prosperous city, due part to the collection of custom taxes (the border with Turkmenistan and Iran is close). A local character of importance is Ismael Khan, a local warlord turned local politicien, then minister. He is quite popular and has the reputation of being an effective (if despotic) administrator.

Dress is Herat is pretty conservative. Many burkas but also many long black hidjabs tied under the chin and ending mid-waist. Some of men's clothes were interesting also. For instance, I saw several men, in white turban, with a long white beard without moustache, wearing khol around their eyes. I am not used to see men wearing such obvious make up and the effect was a little theatrical.

I stayed at DACAAR's guesthouse. I was going to write that it was very comfortable, but on closer examination, that statement reflects more on me getting used to Afghan standards than anything else (uncut floor carpet, unpainted doors, dirty fan, stained wall, etc.) Folks at the office did everything they could to be useful to me. DACAAR's Herat crew has shrunk considerably since the recent layoffs. I think it must be quite depressing to be there at the moment.

There are few internationals in Herat. In fact, I only met some in the plane. The security atmosphere seem less tense than Kabul, although ANSO discourage travelling in the area after 4pm. In addition, there has been serious anti Western riots in the lat twelve months, and a bomb was placed on DACAAR's office five months ago. I was discouraged to go out at night, which is a pity (though it’s not like I would have gone clubbing...).

My first visit in the field was to the Robat-e-Sangee field office. I was shown an irrigation project and another project consisting in growing pistachio. Pistachio sells for a hefty price, but it takes several years for the tree before it produces a sufficient number of nuts. What was specific about that project is the fact that the communal lands were collectively cultivated. The pistachio are planted on a downhill slope and some hole is dug so that water is collected. There were actually not many pistachio trees, far fewer than I imagined, in fact the field had a variety of crops: almonds, watermelon, melon, and some plant used for animal feed that also can be used as a fence (pesants find it difficult to gather construction material for a barbwire fence). I don't know much about agriculture (although I have worked in the fields once upon a time!), but it strikes me as a labor intensive way to cultivate, limiting the use of tractor (which can be found in the area), etc. Perhaps it is so because of the land ownership patterns.

People working in the field office are very dedicated. The folks stay usually away from their families during the week (in some cases their beds are meters away from their desks) and frequently putting twelve hours days (meetings with villagers take places at night).

When I was a student, the emphasis in our courses was on understanding local culture. The project of changing it was looked at with suspicion and easily casted aside as cultural imperialism. This approach strikes me today as quite naïve. Actual development projects aim to bring about some social change such as greater participation of women, collabaratve farming, etc. As long as local culture is taken into account, I don't see this as a problem necessarily. Otherwise you only let ruthless people imposing change (think forced collectivisation of the late 70s, Taliban, etc.)

I did of course all the "touristly" things in Heart (the blue mosk, the citadel, the bazaar, etc.)

Babak arrived yesterday. That was a great news. Almost as good a news, was that I received all the toys I asked him to bring for me: a high tech GPS and car kit, various map software, a pocket PC with miscellaneous accessories and a gps bluetooth adaptor to connect the gps to the Pocket PC. While I was in Herat writing down some travel notes in a notebook, it occurred to me that travelling would never be the same again. From now, on I will travel with a gps, preventing me to get lost and I will write notes and preview photographs with my Pocket PC. Both the GPS unit and the Pocket PC are very nice, I am happy with mty choices. chose a powerful pocket pc with a high resolution (640x480) screen (it is sooo niiice!), which will come handy when designing my navigation system.

On Thursday, there was a rumor of a suicide bomb attack near the Intercontinental Hotel. Yesterday, we also heard a blast in the afternoon. I haven't been able to listen to the news to verify. More than sixty people died in the South of the country in the past week.

On Saturday we went on a little trip. First we stopped at the reservoir. The water level was extremely high, which was funny for us, since we walked on the ice when the level was very low last winter. Later we went to Paghman and hiked in the area (I think the area is pretty mine-free). We saw a few baby cannabis plants. They were pointed out to me of course, I wouldn’t know ;) It appear as if they rotate culture in these field and that cannabis is certainly one of the cultivated crops. Paghman has been a place where Kabulis go in the summer for a long time. They are currently building a lot of holidays houses. Some croatian military police were hanging out there. They did not speek a word of Dari, which is a little disturbing for mps.

Some advances on the geek front. I have managed to obtain two arcview shapefiles. One contains all major roads of Afghanistan (and lakes, rivers, etc) The other has all the streets of Kabul. After a few unsuccessful attempts, I uploaded the first to my gps. It is pretty cool, I now have a good background map (in color no less!) of the city. Getting lost is defintely getting harder, although it is not beyond my capabilities. I am having some trouble with the second shapefile that has a different coordinate system (I am still hopeful that this can be solved with the help of an actual GIS expert). I did find a Pocket PC software that reads the file (I have a bluetooth adaptor for my gps that I use to connect the gps to the Pocket PC) but when I tried to buy it it said it couldn't due to a technology embargo on Afghanistan (it detected my location automatically). I am pretty sure the embargo is over. In terms of programming, I know how to interpret the gps data, but not how to retrieve it. I looked in the books I have but I couldn’t find info on how to programmatically use a bluetooth connection. Will do a search tomorrow.

I am staying

2005-05-29T17:21:00.000+04:30

Well folks, it looks like I am staying after all. I had a pretty frank discussion with my boss’ boss this morning about what I am not happy with at work, at the end of which I decided to continue at DACAAR (providing of course, that my immigration attorney gives me the green light). SQL Server will come, and I will try to use C# to makes things more interesting. My aims for the remainder of my stay in Afghanistan are: to migrate all database to MS Sql Server, to get my navigation system up and running and hopefully even to sell it, and to write a grant for when I come back. She thought I have been in Kabul for too long, and urged me to go somewhere else for a few days. I am leaving tomorrow to Herart for three days. I will also go to New Mexico some time this summer to clear my passport.

It was a storm in a teacup. After all that, I am still doing the same job at the same place. It is exhausting to be around me, I think, because I question many of my life choices quite often. If it is of any comfort, it is exhausting to be me for the same reasons…

Can’t decide

2005-05-29T08:40:00.000+04:30

I am not sure what I am going to do. Today, I am leaning toward staying. Leaving is always easier (for me at least). I do feel far less enthusiasm about remaining in

Afghanistan

than I feel about going backpacking. I can only stay if it does not jeopardize my visa status and my nationalization prospects. It may be alright providing I go back to the States this summer, but I am not sure. I do feel some sense of obligation, commitment, etc. toward DACAAR, but this is the wrong way to think about it. The real questions are: Can I achieve anything here professionally and otherwise (my navigation system)? Am I useful here? Can I turn things around at work so that my work becomes more interesting?

I am not sure. The prospects are not great but I haven’t exhausted all possible efforts to shift things around. On Monday night (11 ½ time difference), I will try to call my immigration attorney for advice.

I may feel better about myself if I stay (I don’t like feeling like a quitter) if I can do good work, but will I enjoy myself? Is anything interesting going to happen in Kabul in the next 8 months? Friends will come and go. I may get some interesting work on the side with my nav. System and all. If I really work at it, I could maybe get some interesting C# and GIS experience, though the bulk of my work will be tedious, I should not kid myself about it. As far as discovering the country is concerned, I may get to know some of my Afghan colleagues better but it is likely that my mobility will remain quite limited for a while. Remaining here could give me enough time to write a grant that, if successful, would allow me to do some interesting work, once I come back to the US. I need to think about all this.

There were no demonstrations in Kabul today, but there were many in Pakistan. I hope Lyn is alright, she is in Islamabad where several demonstrations and a bomb explosion took place. I advised her many time to check for demonstrations, but I don’t think she took me seriously because Islamabad has the reputation to be a quite city where nothing happens (I told you so…).

I went to the Bazaar with Giovanni today. We passed street portrait photographers having a primitive camera that looks one hundred years old, beggars with an uneven number of limbs, car engines mounted on a decorated street carts to press sugarcane, even burkas in bright colors (Oh so vain!). I did not find what I was looking for (a shaver), but I had a good time.

We ate some kebabs on the way back. I do not know if I already mentioned this, but in Afghanistan, restaurants are divided in a main section destined to men that has view on the outside, and a family section, protected by a curtain or a door, where families or women with children eat. You might ask “where to single women sit?” The obvious answer is that you don’t really see any. In many traditional Afghan establishments, there is a mixture of tables with chairs, and areas where you sit on the floor.

On awful food and others things

2005-05-26T11:29:00.000+04:30

Food is generally pretty good in

Afghanistan

. What they serve is not particularly surprising or unique (lots of stewy things, pilau rice, kebabs of all kinds, yogurt, etc.) but it is nice.

I have however tasted two dishes that were truly terrible. One was mantu from a street vendor. Mantu is, short of a better description, a kind of “ravioli” served with a white sauce. I loved this dish when I was in Turkey and I was looking forward to eating it again. Only it did not taste the same, this Afghan mantu had a overwhelming taste of rancid cream. I had to eat at least some of it, so as not to offend the seller, but it took me great pain to achieve this without throwing up.

Today was my second bad experience. There was a little gathering to celebrate my colleague’s promotion. Somebody came around with some “biscuits.” They were solid like a rock and the pungent smell of rotten cheese should have commanded prudence on my part, but I paid no attention to it. I took a large bite and immediately spit it out, putting aside any attempt to remain polite. Are you sure this stuff is for eating? Soap would have tasted better (and yes, I have tried it, although I don't care to explain when and how). It took me many cups of tea to wash off the taste.

I met with my supervisor’s boss today. She said that if I wanted to stay there was a possibility that DACAAR would help me with the cost of my place ticket. I don’t know how risky for me it is to do so, but coming back to the US before six months, then leaving again, is an option that might just work in terms of immigration. The question is: do I want to do so? I will give it some thought over the week-end.

Bureaucracy is a pain at DACAAR as in the rest of Afghanistan, no doubt. It took me thirty-five minutes to withdraw some money (my money!) from my employee account and I had to thank the treasurer for allowing me to do so without all the required signatures.

Internationals in Kabul are getting scared.

2005-05-26T11:25:00.000+04:30

Internationals in Kabul are getting scared. The number of “incidents” in the country is on the rise and even in Kabul, there was something that looked like an attempted hijacking in broad daylight yesterday (that was only narrowly averted). But mostly, it was the recent abduction of the Italian girl (whom many people knew) that affects people the most. Even those who are usually the most lax about safety seem to apply security recommendations with zeal. As my flatmate noted, the very fact that we have curfew reinforces the impression that we live in a dangerous place (“Six thirty already? I’d better head back quickly or else …) whereas the situation may not be more or less dangerous than it was a month ago. There are rumors of possible demonstrations on Friday, and several agencies are on complete lockdown (not DACAAR).

I have slowly started the process of preparing myself to leave Kabul, and I know the day of my departure will come really quickly. In objective terms, my job sucked, my salary was laughable and thanks to curfews and lockdowns, there is not much left of my social life at this point. Yet, that hardly depicts how I feel about this place. I will in fact miss it dearly and digesting memories and insights gained in my journey will take me some time.

I regret I don’t have much more to say about Kabul at the moment. Curfews are not very conducive to exploring the place.

One of the reasons I took this job was to give me the opportunity of changing my professional life. I had a very hard time making a living while being a graduate student, and I became a programmer because I needed a job, it was a happening field (the Internet!), and having been a computer kid when I was 14, I had some facilities with computers (Ah, everybody taught it was a waste of time back then...). Also, I was never successful in finding a job, or a scholarship in the field I studied (social anthropology). So basically, even though I liked the whole computer-internet field and was fairly successful at it, I felt that I never choose my career.

I took the job at DACAAR in the hope that working for a NGO would be more meaningful, that I would get to experience another culture and perhaps even, it would give me an entry to the whole world of development where I might work in any capacity (not just computer related) if I so decided. The experience is mixed. The job wasn’t more meaningful. I liked to be in Afghanistan and to know different people, but expatriate life did not totally meet my expectations either. I hope however that I will have some opportunity to work with others NGOs in the future. I think I am in the right field after all, and that it would be even slightly difficult for me to do something else (I have less than average social skills). The thing is that, if I am to be a geek, I want to be the best geek I can be. Boring, tedious, repetitive work will always be my nemesis (the same apply to everybody, I am sure). I will try to get more challenging work by setting up my own projects, finding the perfect work environment, or by doing shorter term contract work and frequently changing so as vary the skills I use.

Things are shaping up

2005-05-25T10:31:00.000+04:30

I resigned yesterday. My boss looked pained. I felt both guilty and relieved. My notice is one month, minus the accrued holidays. Basically, it works out just fine, I will have one month to travel, and I will be back in the States just in time so that my stay in less than six months.

I do not know if I will travel with my friend Babak or by myself. It depends if his schedule does not conflict with mine. If we travel together (at least for part of the trip), I do not know yet where we'll go. If I am by myself, I plan to go to India. We'll see when he gets here.

A couple of business/grant ideas are taking shape in my head. When I come back, I plan to write a grant proposal and to pitch for some contracts. If it worked out, I would be able to stay in New Mexico.

2005-05-24T08:22:00.000+04:30

Not much to report. There is a suicide bomber warning for the next week and possible demonstrations on Friday. Our lockdown condition is unlikely to change for a while.

Today, I played with a wolf pup. A guesthouse had adopted it. I am not sure it would have been my choice of a guesthouse pet (Wouldn’t an alligator seem friendlier?) It stayed in a cage that was WOLFully inadequate for a wild animal IMHO. It was nice puppy and overall it was fairly friendly. He let me pet him for a while, although it must be said that he also did try to bite me. In fact, italmost succeeded: I could feel his teeth, but I manage to withdraw my fingers just before it broke the skin.

I have decided to give my notice. I do feel rather bad about it (I committed myself for twelve months when I came here), but I am far from being irreplaceable and I know DACAAR will be alright. It just wasn’t a very good match for me workwise. Other than that, I know I will miss Kabul, the people I know and the live I lead here. I know that must sound insane from the outside, and I don’t know how to explain it.

In fairness, my decision to leave has more to do with my immigration worries than with my boredom at work. I am tired of having to worry about my immigration status and I recently decided to become naturalized US citizen. The thing is, it is a little risky for me to stay outside the country for more than six months as it might prevent me to be eligible for citizenship. Right now, I am less than one year away from being able to apply, if this did not work out, I would need to stay another five years (continuously) in the US before being able to apply. I just don’t fancy myself worrying about this kind of stuff for five more years without being able to travel for extended period of time. There is an alternative to this which is to work for the UN in which case, the residency requirements are waived. UN jobs are very well paid as well, but I don’t think it is very likely...

So my plan right now, is to give my notice, to ship most of my things to NM, and then to go backpacking for a month. I can’t remember last time I went backpacking for an extended period of time.

I do have two major regrets about leaving. I won’t be able to travel to

Uzbekistan

with Babak (too dangerous right now if we could even get a visa), although it is possible that we manage to travel together somewhere else. The other regret is that it is possible (but not sure) that I won’t have time to complete my Kabul turn-by-turn navigation project (I hope I will). It would be a bummer after all the time and money (equipment does not come cheap) I invested in the project. I am trying to work as much as possible to finish this in the next month. It is not a lot of time, but that might just be enough. However, I have started to think about others fun to write applications using similar technologies (gps-.Net-C#-database-xml-Pocket PC-mp3-mpeg-bluetooth, ...) that would potentially be quite marketable. That will certainly give me something to do when I get back.

2005-05-19T14:44:00.000+04:30

Today a former TV presenter was shot dead in Kabul. In the country, seven aid workers were killed in an ambush, five yesterday. The people who abducted the aid worker in Kabul have made their demands known (http://www.adnki.com/index_2Level.php?cat=Terrorism&loid=8.0.168552817&par=0). I don't see how a government could possibly accept to have its policy dictated by hijackers. In light of this, I fear the poor girl might remain captive for a while. That is if she stays alive, she is said to suffer from internal bleeding in the head, vomiting and hasn't eaten for three days. It really does not sounds good.

I had a chat with my boss today. I explained how bored I was. She told me that this work will always need to be done, but she recommended me to plan a vacation. Thinking... Vacation is not a bad idea and I have indeed been thinking about it. Kabul gets to you after a while. It would do me some good but, would it solve everything at work?

My Project

2005-05-19T10:51:00.000+04:30

I decided to use my version of the map (vector map, divided into road segments) for the time being. Changing the map at this stage would delay me quite a bit and I would like to get the thing out there (in Beta) pretty quickly. It is great that I have an accurate vector map, but it comes a little too late. I will use it for the next release.

2005-05-18T14:54:00.000+04:30

I am considering resigning tomorrow. We'll see. I will sleep on it. Clearly, I am not doing a good job because I am bored. I don't think the situation is going to improve, so maybe I should cut my losses. It is a shame because I like the organization I work for, the people I work with, and even life in Kabul (I know that must sounds strange from the outside).

On a more optimistic note, I received from a friend the complete accurate map of Kabul in vector format. I don't think it is georeferenced though (if it is, it uses another coordinate system, not lat and lon). If I use that, the result will be more accurate than if I use the map I drew by hand. On the other hand, it represent quite a bit of work. First, I need to parse the .shp binary files, next I need to make sense of the data, which is non trivial because it is a series of polygon, rather than lines and polylines, and last but not least, I need to implement a line intersection algorythm in order to know which road segment connects to which road segment.

Oh yeah, and if I can make it work, I already have a buyer for my navigation system.

2005-05-18T09:46:00.000+04:30

I am still struggling to accept the fact that Kabul is not safe. I tried to think of the issue statistically but no matter how I manipulate the numbers the results are not good. The chance for any of us to be a victim are very small, yet, compared to our home countries, they are still astonishingly high. And then again (here comes the nice rationalization), the chance of being adbucted for an aid worker in Kabul is considerably less than the chance of dying from smoking.

I think this time, we are starting to take security very seriously. We take different routes to our office and leave at different times, so as to make our movements less predictable. If we leave a friend's house, we also call when we arrive to our home destination, etc.

Afghan workers are at risk too (among others incidents, three women were raped and strangled last month), but that is especially the case in the country.

2005-05-17T11:27:00.000+04:30

One CARE worker was kidnapped last night. Everybody is quite upset. One of my friend knew the victim quite well. In a separate incident, eight rockets were fired to a UN compound.

We had a security meeting this morning that fell short of reassuring me. The fleaky argument that "now the kidnappers have what they want, they are not likely to attempt another kidnapping" strikes me as complete rubbish. At any rate, our curfew has been extended and I may try harder to abide by it. We may also soon be carrying a radio in addition to our cell phone.

You might be thinking that it must be real scary to live in Kabul with its abductions, rockets, bombs and the fear of riots. The truth is that it is not. To the contrary, the challenge is to be scared enough. We rationalize risk a lot (you have more of a chance to be shot in New York, etc.) but deep down, we are all aware that the situation is not good. However, just because we *know* about the danger, does not mean that we *feel* it. Perhaps, this is also because we are used to associate danger with specific things, like run-down inner city neighborhood with grafitis and gangs for instance. At any rate, it takes a lot of effort to remain cautious, especially given that security measures can be a real hassle.

I hesitate to suggest to management the possibility of fitting all vehicles with APRS that is a system to broadcast coordinates (measures by GPS) using a low-cost radio transmitter. In that way we would be able to know everybody's position at any time (big brother is watching). The thing is that I don't know anything about radios, therefore I don't have the expertise for it, and I don't know how hard it is to figure it out.

2005-05-15T14:27:00.000+04:30

I am spending a relatively pleasant day at work today. Regarding my earlier thoughts of leaving early... I am still considering it, but it is quite possible that I mostly need a holiday. I don't know what will happen to my plans of traveling to Uzbekistan, but either way I will go somewhere in the next two months.

2005-05-14T09:53:00.000+04:30

There were some violent clashes between demonstrators and the police yesterday. More than ten people died as a result. The police does not have much training in peacefully containing the crowds, neither do they care much about human life it seems, so they spray bullets to disperse the demonstration (which is certainly effective, but). I get most of my news from BBC world service on the radio and they did not specify where this took place. I think it was somewhere up North, but I don’t know. I heard what appeared to be a demonstration in the morning yesterday (I did not think it was wise to go an look) but it sounded peaceful. There are rumors that some national protests are to take place today in Kabul, so we’ll see. I read an article in the paper describing the riots in Jalalabad. They mentionned that people were, I quote, "hunting for foreigners." That does not sound too good, does it.

I don’t know about my plans to travel to Uzbekistan, there is quite some turmoil (totally unrelated) over there as well (up to three hundred deaths) so we'll have to see how that evolves.

We had some people over last night, it was nice. The weather is also warming up nicely and we have roses all over the garden.

Work wise, I am still working on georeferencing my vector map of Kabul. In theory, one can georeference a map with two or three points of reference, but if I do so, the results are really not accurate enough. Keep in mind that a difference of a few pixels can equate to hundreds of meters on the ground. Therefore, I am devising a system using a larger number of points of reference (about 30). Then I will estimate the coordinate of each point, only instead of using a generic formula for the whole map, I will assess the point’s location based on its distance to the closest known points of reference. This will distort the map somewhat but it should make for a more reliable map.

Erratum: I had previously mentioned that the whole map of Kabul was composed of about 700 route segment. I don’t know how I got to that figure. The actual number is closer to 9000 (it will be interesting to see how that affects performance).

We are under locked down today, that is to say that we have been asked to stay at home. It has been since Thursday night that we are asked to stay in the house. Apparently, ANSO (the main organization that issues security guidelines here) would have issued a warning to internationals to be ready for evacuation. I know that this is the worse case scenario (and a pretty unlikely one) but still…

2005-05-13T09:49:00.000+04:30

It has only been three and half months that I have been here and already I am considering leaving Dacaar early. It is not that it has been a bad experience, I met nice people, got to know a beautiful country, even learnt a lot of computer skills during my spare time, etc. etc. If it wasn’t for the work, which is tedious and boring, I would probably stay. But what am I achieving here? Nothing. I came here, at least in part, to help, and I don’t even feel I am a good worker. More importantly, I came here to be part of an organization I value. DACAAR is a great NGO, but one thing they are not good at (euphemism), is internal communication. I hear through the grapevine about important policy decisions. I would like to be better informed, to feel I am part of it. If it is just a matter of doing a boring computer job, I can do that anywhere, have hot water and electricity and even get paid real money for it (not that I care). Clearly, that’s not why I came here.

We are under high alert, at the moment (fear of possible riots in the next couple of days) and that might slightly affect my judgment as well.

Some things get clearer when you are away from “home.” It has become clear to me that I value a lot my residency in the US, hence my readiness to swap my EU citizenship for a US passport (although I do feel European - not Belgian though). I still intend to travel, but as I said, the US is the place I’ll be back to in between. Additionally, I have had to think about what I’ll do next. I don’t know if I will stay in New Mexico. I might, but I am not sure. For one thing, the job market is very small and I don’t know if I would find a position easily, especially considering I don’t really want to work for the Department of Defense or the labs (and I couldn’t anyway, I am not eligible for a security clearance).

This has led me to think about what I value in a place to live. To my surprise, on top of my list was nature. This is one thing I love about New Mexico. I would like to live in a beautiful place that has national parks and plenty of hiking/cycling opportunity within driving distance. There are some nice picnic spots around here, but no place where one can hike without fearing of having one’s legs blown off. I have been looking at the US state by state. I have only visited a few (seven) states, which makes things difficult. Alaska would be nice but I wouldn’t stand the winter and there aren’t any jobs. Hawaii would be lovely but they have quarantine for dogs, etc. etc. Currently, I am thinking that Southern California might be a good place. There are plenty of openings and possibly the highest concentration of national parks in the whole country. The proximity of the ocean is also a bonus and it is not too far (it is relative) from New Mexico. Rent might be an issue though. At any rate, I will be looking at short to medium term contract opportunities at first. After a while, I would like to travel again. There is an organization (geekcorps.org) that dispatches techies to Africa on short term assignments and I might try to go with them.

Once I get my turn-by-turn homemade navigation system of Kabul working, I will also try to meet with aims'folks (a UN organization that does a lot of cartography, GIS work, etc.), they are bound to be interested and they might have some ideas for me.

I have really liked the people I have been working with both here and in New Mexico. I can only hope to be that lucky in my next job.

2005-05-12T14:33:00.000+04:30

The demonstration in Kabul disbanded peacefully and no material damages were reported, but there are some concerns regarding tomorrow (after some imams' sermon) and on Saturday (a new demonstration may take place).

In the meantime, we have been given a satellite phone and a spare phone card, both for emergencies.

It's a riot...

2005-05-12T09:37:00.000+04:30

Some demonstrations turned into a riot yesterday in Jalalabad. The demonstration were anti-US, but also anti-government, and anti-western. There were a few deads, many injured and some government offices and car burnt. Today, there are two demonstrations in Kabul. They are going through the center of town where we are and we have been advised to stay inside the work compound. Sadly, it did not prevent us to go to work;)

Afghan Joke on foreign Aid (rather harsh)

2005-05-10T14:56:00.000+04:30

A sheepherder was walking along behind his sheep out along the Kandahar Road minding his own business when a man in a White Land Cruiser pulled and got out.

Hello, sheepherder, he said. If I can tell you exactly where you are and exactly how many sheep you have, may I have one?

Sure, said the sheepherder, thinking the man a fool.

The man pulled out his pocket GPS/calculator/diary/satphone/ipod and punched away for a couple of minutes then said You are exactly 7.44 km from Kandahar and there are 131 animals in your flock.

The sheepherder was mildly surprised and said You are right, take one of my animals.

Just before the man got back into the car, the sheepherder said If I can tell you your profession in one go can I have my animal back? Of course, said the man, knowing full well that this sheepherder was a simpleton with no capacity.

You are a [insert organisation of choice] consultant. said the sheepherder.

"Amazing," said the man. "How did you \r\nknow?"

Amazing, said the man. How did you know?

It is simple, said the sheepherder You came here without being asked; you used high technology to tell me what I already knew; and you overcharged for the information. Now can I have my sheep back.

2005-05-10T10:57:00.000+04:30

I was trying to georeference my map yesterday, when I realized that I barely knew what latitude and longitude were, let alone how to use them to calculate distances. So I did some internet search and once again, I found my answers in some fifth grade teaching materials. At the very least this project, makes me understand things that the crappy primary and high-school student I was never learnt. Last week it was basic trigonometry.

I also took an important decision that is to try to become an American citizen when I get back in the US. It was not an easy thing to decide (and it is far from being done) because for some complicated reason, I will loose my current citizenship in the process. I wouldn't care about having my Belgian nationality taken away from me (I'd perversely enjoy it even) except that with it, comes residency rights in the entire European Union, which is harder to relinquish. However, I do think of the US as my "base", the place I would go back to between travels and ultimately as much as a "home" as I have. I just hate having to worry about whether or not travelling for x amount of time will affect my residency rights. I have been thinking of where I'll go next, and I haven't entertained the thought of going back to Europe.

House arrest

2005-05-09T10:50:00.000+04:30

We received some a list of things to do when you are kidnapped. I am glad we did. It is important to know the proper etiquette in various contexts; one does not want to offend. As I mentioned, we are under curfew for the next two weeks. It is much like house arrest without the electronic bracelet.

There is really nothing better to do for me at night than to program my navigation system. I bet I will do some real progress in the coming weeks. I have finished dividing Kabul map into digital route segments. There are 732 of them, which strikes me as not that many (Kabul is a fairly small city), although it felt like there were a lot while I was drawing them. Next, I need to georeference the map (that is, translate the coordinates on my map into latitude and longitude) and then I will work on some code to display a portion of the map based on the user’s position (with the user placed at the center of the screen). Later, I will join that code, with my shortest route to destination algorithm , at which point we'll be almost there. Of course, there will be some threading issues to solve and a decent user interface to create.

2005-05-08T10:40:00.000+04:30

This morning, I got called in for an unscheduled meeting. I was half expecting getting fired (can you tell I have a heavy conscience?), but really it was to discuss the security situation. It is rapidly deteriorating, it seems. In Kabul there were two failed abduction attempts over the week-end (which brings the number to three in the last thirty days). In a separate incident, a bomb or grenade attack took place in an Internet café. The number of incident in the whole country is of course far greater. We are under curfew again: no more moving after dark for the time being. I still think that Afghanistan is somewhat dangerous but primarily due to the high incidence of accidents in the air and on the road, the risk of being asphixiated by a furnace, blasted by a gas explosion, carbonized by a domestic fire, or more simply stung by a scorpion (there are quite a few. A kid was walking a scorpion attached to a string - like a dog on a leash- close to my house, the other day).

Today, it is chilly and the sky is completely overcast. As often when this is the case, one of my Afghan colleague commented, without any sarcasm "Nice weather."

Regarding my project: I attempted to parse the ArcView file data file (not totally easy, it is a binary file). I managed to read the file header but not the file itself. I am not exactly sure what was the problem as I am pretty sure my code is correct. Anyway, I did not want to spent too much time on this, since it only contains major circulation axis. In the end, I used Adobe Illustrator to mark each road segment. I haven’t finished, but almost. I will be done tonight. The idea is to save it as svg, and then to parse and convert the file.

new paradigm?

2005-05-05T14:28:00.000+04:30

I am starting to use my interface to mark each route segment and I am not terribly happy. I don't think this will be good enough. No doubt, I also say that because manually marking each route segment is such a pain in the ass.

I am revisiting previous idea I had. In previous attempt, I had generated one nice scalable vector graphic map (in case you don't know, svg is an XML based markup to describe vector gaphics) . I am wondering if perhaps I couldn't parse that file and use the information it contains. Most it content is some hideous metadata, but the svg markup itself is quite simple. Incidently, I also found some C# SVG libraries on the web.

Much to think about this week-end. I am not quite sure which direction to take.

Geek update

2005-05-05T11:55:00.000+04:30

I re-wrote the interface of my first software and I came up with something I am reasonably happy with. It is something akin to the Photoshop navigation tool: there is a main image window and a small navigation screen. On the later, there is a slider that lets you determine the scale of the map. On top of the slider is a thumbnail of the whole image on which you can move a red rectangle (its size varies according to the scale) that indicates which part of the image is currently blown up. I also added a grid tool to manually edit the data. Other gimmicks include a feature to automatically sense if you are clicking in proximity of an existing route, in which case, the route can be joined automatically. There are still some bugs, but the program looks pretty good overall and is good enough to enter data.

I will start entering data this week-end. I have been concerned that maybe the data won’t be precise enough to serve as base for the navigation.

Meanwhile, I am considering some alternative (or complementary) approaches. I found on aims’ website, good road info on Afghanistan in Arcview shape (.shp) format. It goes without saying that this does not cover Kabul’s side streets but there is a good coverage of the main axis of circulation. It is a good news in its own right because, I will be able to transfer the shape files directly to my gps. In fact, before I get it, it would like to set up the map and all waypoints of interest so that the gps will be ready to use immediately. I have now several maps I can use: I have the Magellan’s worldwide base map (ok for Afghanistan, poor for Kabul), the aims shape info (great for Afghanistan, ok for Kabul but I like it because it is in vector format), the old Russian topo. map. (it is georeferenced, but I have been told not to trust it and to check these measurements), and the aims Kabul map (but I need to georeference it).

I am trying to see if there is a way to extract the data from the shape file. There might be with the Arc GIS commercial software but these bastards don’t have an eval version offered for download on the site. I will bug Giovanni in our GIS department to see if he can do anything with the shapefile. Alternatively, I could parse the file. It is not easy because it is a binary file, but not impossible. I found the specifications of the file format.

I am currently at work and work is not going well at all. I am sooo bored! It takes me the greatest effort to get anything done and I have to really watch it because I will get in trouble if this continues. I know, I should try harder, finish the project I am currently doing and then start using mySQL and C# if possible.

2005-05-03T08:25:00.000+04:30

Little set back on my project. Yesterday, I started to use my software to get coordinate info from the map when I realized that the scale was inadequate to gather precise enough information. I have been working on a zooming function since. The image zoom works but I am having difficulty in having the raster image (the background map) scroll exactly in sync with the vector graphics (the coordinates points). I tried to resolved this for a few hours, then my brain got so fogged that I use brute force (any possible variation of the equation) without success either. I am still working on it.

Looks like most of my former colleagues and friends in New Mexico are having babies. It is quite strange because over here, children are few and there is a disproportionate amount of single folks (especially male) among expatriates.

2005-05-01T13:44:00.000+04:30

The paper this morning quotes Karzai as saying "Messenger of Islam taught us how to live with others in tranquility." Mmm. How has that been working for you?

2005-05-01T13:33:00.000+04:30

Eureka and victory! I found a way to make my work more interesting. It is simple; I will develop all future projects in C#. My boss think that it is a good idea for the organization (it is, it will help us eradicate Access) and I am thrilled because I will have the opportunity to become really good at it. I don’t think I can cope with twelve months of Access without a lobotomy. Only snag is: I still need to finish my current projects first. Mind you, C# is easier than I expected and I suspect it will get boring after a while too, but not for a few months, hopefully.

Soon, I will also write code in Java (the two languages are very alike, so I don’t think it will be a problem. What I really want, as far as IT is concerned, is to be a Java-JSP-Xml-Oracle kind of guy. There is still some way to go but I feel I am not that far off anymore.

I am a little concerned about what is going to happen to my applications after my departure. It can’t be easy to find such a programmer/database analyst/dba in Afghanistan, otherwise, they wouldn’t have hired me. From my selfish perspective, working with .Net and Java for a year, gives me the opportunity to build valuable experience and will make it easier for me to find a job when I return to the US.

Spent the week-end working and it was worthwhile! I finished the first software I had to write, which is basically a desktop application to author routable information based on a raster map. There is still some work needed to make it a reusable application, but it looks pretty good. Now comes, the shitty part, actually designing each route segment with the software.

Dogs with Rabies

2005-04-27T13:48:00.000+04:30

Sweet discovery: the water supply unit has a detailed digitalized topographical map of the whole country. It is a 30 years old map, so here and there things have change a bit, but nevertheless it is a good map. And the best part is: it comes already georeferenced. I don’t know if I will use it in my project (I might) as the street map I have is more useful for most purposes. However, having this resource is great. Once I get my gps (in a few weeks) I will be able to download accurate map to my gps anywhere I go in Afghanistan.

I took a step back in my project, and I am now studying a few introductory chapter I had skipped. I am still hoping to start coding on the graphics part this Saturday.

One of the expat. Working for DACAAR has a dog. She was on holidays and asked one of her colleagues to take care of it in her absence. Yesterday, I heard the dog was very sick. I offered to go there. The dog was in pitiful shape. She had lost much of her coat, and underneath, the skin was irritated. The dog was still friendly. It was too late to do anything so we came back today at lunch time. Alexendra (the owner) was back already and the vet was there. He had just put her down (her, that is the dog, not Alexendra). As it turned out, the dog had rabies. As much as it saddens me, killing the dog (putting her to sleep if you prefer hypocritical euphemisms) was the right thing to do. Not only was the dog in a far too advance stage of the disease to be cured, but more importantly a dog with rabies constitute a serious health hazard. I would be very surprised if the chawkidars (guards) were vaccinated against rabbies and they are around the dog. I guess that is why you should vaccinate your pets against rabbies, but it is not an easy thing to do here. In general, people just don't have dogs as pet and this is true for most of the muslim world.

Giovanni (the guy looking after the dog) has some ethical problems caring about a dog when some many people needs care around us. I understand what he means; it is indeed indecent (but so is spending $10 on a meal). The thing though, is that I really like dogs, I feel a certain connection with them. Dogs like me and I feel good around them. Sometimes I think I like dogs more than people (which is not to say that I think one should care about dogs and not about people).

2005-04-26T10:12:00.000+04:30

I spent the evening reading on graphic classes. I thought I had found the right book (an electronic edition). Unfortunately, when I tried the examples, after reading the 60 pages chapter, none of them worked, and I don’t mean that there were a typo or two, every f* line generated an error. I don’t know if the author wrote his book based on a beta release or what. I think I will have to look for a good book here or hunt down more info on msdn (which is a little difficult given that I don’t have internet access at home). Thing is, I have more than half a dozen e-books on VB.Net and C#, but only the one I tried today goes into graphics. My java library is actually much better but I would really prefer to use something simple like vb.net.

Other than that, ok day at work. I also found some supplies for my project online, things I could not live without, like a y splitter for car cigarette adaptor (do you realize how essential that is to run both my pda and my gps off the battery?) and a pda car mount.

To add to the frustration, Dell cancelled my PDA order. Go figure why, probably I could not tell them accurately the phone number on file with my bank (He, I forget. You know how many times I change phone number?) or my daily limit was reached. Anyway, they told me to contact their customer service but it’s a 800 number so I can’t call from here and… these things quickly become a major hassle. I gave another try to the order and if it fails, I have a contingency plan. I really want a Dell though.

One of many shisha nights

2005-04-25T14:17:00.000+04:30

More of the same

2005-04-25T08:18:00.000+04:30

My software project is progressing nicely. My work (for-a-living work) is not going well on the other hand. It is dull and repetitive. I am hopelessly and utterly bored and I have to make the greatest efforts to get anything done at all. I taken a number of steps to try to get more interesting projects, but they are still far from materializing. If you had asked me a month ago, I would have said my intention was to stay probably twelve months or more. At this point, I am actually wondering how long more I can stand designing little Access apps. I like Kabul and my workplace fine, it is just the work.

I came here to make a difference and to live an adventure. A difference, I don’t think I make any. As for the adventure, believe it or not, it is rather tame. I guess I feel discouraged. I am glad that I have my own project to keep me sane.

I explained a portion of my software to my flatmate and she wasn’t at all impressed, it was rather amusing (“Why don’t you just learn to read a map?”). My parents had the same reaction. It is difficult to explain technical progress to people who are not technology minded. I mean, I could travel to work on the back of a donkey as well, the fact is I use a car. My geek friends are quite excited on the other hand. We are looking forward to driving a geekmobile that has a number of high-tech navigation instruments attached to the windshield. The way I look at it is like this. When man stopped having fur, he got cold and invented fire. When he no longer had teeth strong enough to devour an animal carcass, he invented tools (and cooking). Well, for those of us who no longer have the sense of direction: we invent a software for PDA and gps. It is a no brainier.

I ordered myself a nice little PDA. I took the nicest one I could find, one that has a 640x480 resolution display (remember the time, not so long ago, when we were designing web pages for that resolution?), WI-FI and Bluetooth. I will order a windshield mount also. The only thing I would like are a good reference book on VB.Net (might be possible to buy locally) and one on Beginning Math for 3D graphics.

Oh yeah, and there was an explosion on Jalalabad road tonight. I don’t know the details. It is possible that it was close to the ISAF base, but I am just speculating. We have been asked to stay home.

I have been doing some thinking on the routable Map creator program I want to write (I actually already started a bit). The aim of the program is to help me extract the routable information from the map. I think I might end up writing it in C#, because I have better reference material for C# than for VB.Net (even though the later would have my preference). Reading about ADO.NET tonight, will read on all graphic classes next. It might take me a while, hopefully by Saturday I hope I will be able to do some coding.

The holy grail getting closer ...

2005-04-24T11:50:00.000+04:30

I wasn’t able to find a map authoring software for Pocket PC that supports routing information. As a result, I re-visited the idea of writing my own. I thought that creating the routing algorithm would be the main challenge. I made a deal with myself that if I was able to write a suitable algorithm, I would buy myself a Pocket PC. The rationale was that if that problem were solved, there is no reason why writing the software would be impossible.

I started to do some research, and against all expectations, the algorithm in question is well-known from CS (Computer Science) students and is rather simple.

So, it looks like I will be getting myself a Pocket PC. After all, I am learning to program for things. Getting a device costs me a few hundreds, attending a course would cost me several thousands.

My plan for this week-end is to learn enough of VB.NET to program this. I choose VB.NET for the time being because 1)there is support for the Pocket PC platform and 2) there is an VB.NET API that exists to get data from the gps and 3) it is quite easy and VB.NET is now pretty object oriented. Long term though, I don’t know if I will keep it in that language. It would be pretty cool to do it in Java if there is a version of Java Virtual Machine for Pocket PC. Java has a 3D graphic API, You see where this is going? A 3D navigation system, now that… But I am getting way ahead of myself. Gosh, I haven’t been so excited about programming for a very long time.

* *

VB.Net would not be that simple if I did not know some vb and Java. It is just amazing how much they ripped off from Sun’s programming language. Basically VB.Net is a kind of simplified Java with some odd VB syntax here and there. It is not a politically correct thing to say, but I rather like VB.Net and Visual Studio.Net. Perhaps I should try to find a similar IDE for Java. Whatever vi freaks might say, a good intuitive visual IDE (e.g. definitely not vi) makes a difference. Sure I can code with DOS edit or Notepad, but why would I? It is funny because I study Java for some time, but hardly ever practiced it and now, with VB.NET it all starts to really fall into place. At first sight, it sounds neat that you can use a variety of programming language to program for the .Net environment, however, VB.NET and C# are so alike, I don’t know why they bothered.

Many, probably even most people hate programming. This is just a sign that they are healthy and sane. It is intrinsically frustrating, yet, at its best, it is quite an addictive activity. The thing is that, it always looks like you getting so pretty damn close. Just one more try and perhaps…

* *

At last, I did it! It took me an embarrassingly long amount of time, but it works. I got a program that calculates the approximated shortest path between two points based on a map. There is still plenty for me to program: to get the information in a db or file, to write another application to simplify the measuring and georeferencing of Kabul’s image map, to graphically display directions and last but not least to use gps information.

I am thinking that perhaps I should be ambitious for once and try to write a software of commercial quality. It is not the first time I work on a project that has a commercial potential, but I have never carried this through, in part, no doubt, because I am not that great a businessman.

But right now, I deserve a break. I am not sure how to reward myself. I am going to get some easy to watch DVD and to chill down a bit.

* *

I got myself some movies and some software (various dev. tools including JBuilder Enterprise and Oracle 10g). Unfortunately, when I got home the DVD player died. It is pretty bad because it is not even mine, it is a loaner. I may end up having to buy two dvd players: one for the house and one to replace the loaner that broke. Shit, that’s really expensive. My eyes are too tired to read. I’ll have a nap instead…

Geek note continued

2005-04-20T08:38:00.000+04:30

I spent all of last evening trying to create a color vector map of Kabul.

Adobe streamline creates a black and white vector image. To have the map in color, I carefully selected each color separately from the raster file, then vectorized it in Streamline and eventually I imported it as a layer in Illustrator.
Eventually got an ok 8 colors vector map of Kabul. I fiddled with various saving formats to reduce its size and later saved it as an autocad .dxf file, a format that is supported by the map creation software (Map Mobile).
Unfortunately, it failed. I could not make the file smaller than 4Mb (compared to 600Kb for the optimized raster gif image) and that was too large. I looks like it is going to be a raster map.
The lesson of the story I guess, is that a vector image can be much larger than a raster image when the drawing is complex (as is the case with a map). I might get better result if I actually redesigned the map with simpler shapes but that is a lot of work and it would be difficult to do without a graphic tablet. Who knows, if I have a very dull week-end, I might give it a try.

More on being a geek

2005-04-19T08:43:00.000+04:30

I have been sick for the last couple of days and my productivity at work has peeked at 10% of what it usually is. It was nothing too bad, but serious enough for me to use one of my joker cards: a course of large spectrum antibiotic that nukes any bad bacteria in your system in three days.

Meanwhile, being naturally a little obsessive with things, I have pursued my quest for the ultimate navigation system in Kabul (the holy grail as far as I am concerned). The problem is that there are no good ready made gps maps for this city. There is on the other hand a very good map of Kabul (in Adobe Acrobat format). The challenge is to use it with a gps navigation device.

Below is a log of my activities (skip if you are not a geek). Email any suggestion you might have.

Considered writing my own software. Toyed with the idea of connecting the gps to a Pocket PC (via a Bluetooth adaptor). Started studying VS.NET and VB.NET and examined various API to manipulate gps data on window CE.
Found ready made software to create custom map on Pocket PC. Tested it with success on a Pocket PC emulator.
After posting a question to the Magellan Meridian egroup, found software to design custom map for my GPS directly!
Extracted map from the pdf with Photoshop. Downloaded freeware to convert raster to vector graphic. Started optimizing map for vectorization. Poor results.
Looked for a PDF ripper that extract vector graphic from an Adobe Acrobat document. The document did not import into the map creation software, presumably because it was too large.
Encountered success by importing the file as raster graphic, after reducing size and limiting the number of colors to 8.
Did not look at the expense and bought the entire collection of Adobe products ($3). Attempted to extract the vector graphic from the PDF with Adobe Acrobat writer. Failure.
Prep. the file in Photoshop by increasing contrast and converting to black and white, then converted it to vector graphic in Adobe Streamline, saved it as Illustrator file, then opened it in Illustrator and saved it as autocad document. It did import successfully into the map creation software but the quality was disappointing. The raster map is better.
After different prepping of the file in Photoshop and fiddling with Streamline settings, I got OK results. May get better results by dealing with each color separately.

Now that I found out how to create a custom map for my gps, I can’t help but think What about creating a routable map of Kabul (i.e. maps giving turn by turn directions). Unfortunately, I do not believe this is possible with Magellan GPSes. It is possible on some Garmin units but I think it requires a software that is extremely expensive.

On the way to the software shop I had my first flat tire (a very common occurrence in Kabul). People are very generous here, when it comes to providing assistance and in no time a crowd had gathered first to coach, then to assist the inept foreigner. As a thank you, I ended up buying two overpriced socks from the street seller who assisted me the most.

Infrastructure is developing in Afghanistan, roads are getting better and in Kabul, there has been a recent proliferation of traffic signs (still there really aren’t many) that just did not exist a couple of months ago.

At work, I presented my idea to use a PDA to simplify the data entry process in the field and it was well received. Depending on the cost, there is a chance that I might get the green light. I have been templted to get a Pocket PC myself, as I really would like to learn how to program for these devices but I don't know if I can really afford it right now.

Sense of direction (or lack thereof)

2005-04-19T08:41:00.000+04:30

I do not have the sense of direction. I mean, not at all. It is hard to convey how frustrating it is, humiliating even, especially, if you don’t like to rely on others people. According to my cousin, a psychology professor (who himself could not find his way out of a paper bag), there is a strong genetic component to the ability to orient oneself in space. I take this as meaning that I am screwed no matter how much I try.

From a fairly young age, I have taken the habit of carrying with me a map of the city I am in at all times. I also memorize how to get to places, but the fact that I know how to get somewhere, in no way implies that I will be able to retrace my steps later.

About five years ago, I found the ultimate device for retards such as myself: a gps. In case you don’t know, it is a navigation device, that indicates your position (calculated by satellite) relative to others points of interests and/or a map. I hesitated to bring a GPS with me when leaving for Afghanistan. At the last minute, I decided against it. “No need to be geekier than I need to, I’ll manage with a map,” I thought. What a mistake that was! For a start, street names (or house numbers for that matter) are never indicated, which makes a map pretty useless, should you get lost. On top of that, I met fellow geeks here, who use GPSes on a daily basis, which make me green with envy.

I decided buy myself a nice gps. One that works for hiking, cycling and for driving and gives turn by turn directions in the US and in Europe. However, the post being what it is, I couldn’t have it delivered here, instead I had it shipped to my friend Babak in Holland who will bring it when he comes back to Kabul. The whole process takes months.

Just another week-end

2005-04-17T10:24:00.000+04:30

Nothing much to report: last week-end was rather sober by the last few weeks’ standard. Thursday night we had dinner at the Iranian restaurant and we smoked shisha at the DACAAR staff house with our afghan colleagues. On Friday, I went to a Hash. The first part of the walk was painful due to the unbearable stench of open sewers (a common thing in Kabul), but the second consisted of a nice, though strenuous, hike to the top of a hill. After that, we had the usual hash circle. I was “baptized,” that is to say I received my hash name, but I won’t share it here. Later, I had a few drinks with some guys at a guesthouse, followed by dinner at the “dumpling house” (cute waitress, ok food). There we had a heated discussion about monarchy. Having grown up in a constitutional monarchy myself, I personally developed a rather complex and nuanced opinion on the matter (behead ‘em).

I haven’t decided what to do with the hash. It is really good for me socially (it is nice to meet new people) and physically (I am out of shape here). However, it also strikes me as so culturally insensitive at times that I don’t know that I want to have any part in it. For instance, Friday’s hike passed through a cemetery. There was a path there, but really cemeteries are a place to honor and mourn the dead, not to do recreational sightseeing. In addition, the hash circle took place in the garden. It is surrounded by tall walls but neighbors can still see and hear from the second floor windows, and I am just not comfortable with singing drinking songs in that context. It is not like people don’t drink here. In fact, I have yet to meet an Afghan who does not drink when given the opportunity, and that includes people who pray five times a day, but that does not mean that drinking takes place in the open. The philosophy here seems to be that whatever takes place inside someone’s home is nobody’s business. My instinct is to leave the hash, but I supposed a more mature attitude would be to discuss my concerns with the group. We’ll see.

Babak, my friend and partner in crime, is leaving today although he will be back in June. His departure will leave a gap here; he is a fun guy to be around.

Some news on the work front: lately, work has been rather dull. I am waiting for the management to release the funds necessary for a well-needed system upgrade I have been looking forward to. In the meantime, I am stuck with designing Access applications, which is hardly challenging (there is not much to Access, really). Such is the nature of computer work, for each interesting project, you get five boring ones. I am waiting for a meaty project, but I get tedious ones instead. However, I have been thinking of a way to streamline a terribly cumbersome process that plagues the Water Supply Unit, using pocket PCs hocked up to GPSes. It is not terribly likely that management would go for it, given the financial mess DACAAR is currently in, but I will make a pitch anyway. I would really like to do that. It would give me a change to learn news skills (.Net, designing PowerPC apps, toying with GIS even) and most of all it would be real fun and it is guaranteed to simplify the work of a number of people. In fact, I have been so excited about it, I have started to learn .Net already. I got Visual Studio .Net Enterprise Edition and a CD full of electronic books for a few bucks at a local store.

2005-04-10T16:35:00.000+04:30

I received a letter today. An old fashioned paper letter. So despite everything I said, it appears that the post does work (at least in Kabul). Of course, it did take over two months for the letter to arrive, but the important thing is that it did. For reference, here is my address, but do not send anything valuable as I doubt it would arrive.

Lev Weinstock (IT UNIT)
DACAAR
PAIKOB-E-NASWAR
WAZIRABAD
KABUL, AFGHANISTAN

There was an attempt to abduct a foreigner in Kabul today.

Hidjab

2005-04-10T12:29:00.000+04:30

Some time ago, I mentioned that women may wear a hidjab or even a burka in one context, then take it off later. I thought it was puzzling. Sure, social pressure account in part for women covering themselves in the street but that is not all. My mistake was to think that because women cover their hair, there is a taboo on showing one’s hair in public. If you think, in terms of taboo, then it does not make any sense that the same person sometimes wears it, sometimes doesn’t. I think that it may be better thought of as a matter of decency. What is decent in one context is not in another. There is nothing strange there, you don’t dress the same to go to a club, to hang out with friends or to go to work.

2005-04-10T12:27:00.000+04:30

A group of us (two Afghan and three expats) went to Salang today. It was alright, but not the best outing we have made. The drive is scenic. We would have liked to venture off the main road into local villages but the two Afghans we were with were adamant this was not a good idea (in their own words “We cannot guarantee your safety there”). We reluctantly did the right thing and followed their advice.

Today, I was asked for the first time by an Afghan man what my religion was. It came to me as a surprised that it took so long for somebody to ask the question. According to my past experiences in the muslim world, it is usually about the first question one is being asked. I answered honestly (“I am a Jew”) without getting into the specifics (“ethnically and culturally a Jew, atheist as far as religion is concerned”). I have been trying to keep a low profile here, in order not to make myself to appetizing a target. I haven’t forgotten Daniel Perl. I mean, getting shot is one thing, but having one’s head sawed off… that’s just unacceptable! You’ve got to draw the line somewhere.

Seriously though, we are not much in danger here. I talked to somebody today and according to him, there is no way that in Kandahar we would have the freedom to drive ourselves around like we do here.

Beggars

2005-04-10T12:25:00.000+04:30

In general, there are no that many beggars in Kabul, compared to others places where I have been. Sure, there are some of them (usually with a limb missing) standing in the middle of the road asking drivers for money, but in most places one is not so harassed. Some neighborhoods, such a Flower street are a notable exception. Kids try aggressively to sell newspapers, gums or they asked straight out for money. Sometimes, they hold some thin can that contains coal and some shrub. People spread some smoke it produces around cherished possessions or people to protect them against the evil eye. According to somebody with whom we discussed today, this is an Islamic tradition (clearly it is not). Funny the thing with spreading the smoke appears in many cultures.

At first, I was embarrassed and did not know what to do when kids came to me. I feel a little more comfortable dealing with it now. I do give sometimes but the problem is that if you do, you are guaranteed to have an army of dirty kids in rags following you for money. They are really nice kids for the most part but it is difficult to be followed like that.

The others types of beggars are women, always wearing the burka and often holding a child. They do no only beg, they wail. They are also extraordinary resilient and may follow you for a long time.

The other day an article in the Kabul times (a four-pages English newspaper) read something like “measures have been taken to move the beggars to a previously discussed location.” Frightening, isn’t it? Anyway, when you are eventually done with your shopping, you still have to fight your way to your vehicle. Kids claim they have been watching the car while you were gone and ask for a reward. In addition, no matter how many times and how firmly you say no, somebody is going to wash you car and request payment.

2005-04-10T12:21:00.000+04:30

I went to a party last night. I had been told it was a salsa party and I was looking forward to see how rusty my dancing skills were. Unfortunately, there was no salsa dancing (well, one or two songs perhaps). The good thing however, was that the bar was well provided with rum. I drink little or nothing during the week, but on Thursday nights, I seem to have contracted the habit of drinking most of a bottle of hard liquor. Oddly, it does not even give me a hangover the next day. As I like to say, I have been trained in Belfast (where any self-respecting man or woman drinks 6-10 pints between five and eleven pm, safely gets home and is at work on time the next day). The part I like the least about this is the discomfort I feel when passing the chawkidars when I get home. I haven’t drunk like this since my high school days.

I think in part it is the lack of “things to do” in Kabul that makes people join parties. Hobbies, organized activities are a very middle-class consumerist concept. It does not translate well in many part s of the world. In the West, people are ideally expected to have a hobby and some fixed portion of time dedicated to it (say: going to the gym twice a week and play guitar with a band on Saturday). Not here. Expats have plenty of opportunity to get tense during the week (work frustration, living conditions more difficult than those they are used to, security concerns,. …). We need to decompress in a place we can lift the rules of behaviors we need to abide by during the week. I do want to meet Afghans socially (and I do), but the all expats parties are a place where to let off steam.

People were very excited to introduce me to a French speaking Belgian. I don’t have an iota of patriotic fiber in me. I know it came from a good place and I din’t mean to be rude… but who gives a fuck (excuse my language) if he comes from the same depressing puny place as I do? I have been trying to sever my ties to that country for well over a decade, and I have been rather successful at it.

Before the party, we watched a very forgettable movie. The movie (in English) had English subtitles as well. As is often the case, the subtitles were not a straight transcription of the dialogue and in many cases did not make any sense whatsoever (e.g. “Kazakhstan arrives”). The explanation I have been given (and I accept it short of a better one) is that the movie is first translated into Chinese subtitles, then were translated from Chinese to English). Talking about this, I saw a great piece of afghan English today “French bakery, a frEnchised bakery.”

My dad called me as well. It called at a bad time, the connection was very poor and I was rather curt on the phone. The thing is, I haven’t talked to him for a while, and he starts with his fatherly concerns (“what are you going to do next?”). Party pooper! I still am still in Kabul for a while and have plenty of time to think about it. Really, I just got here. To tell the truth, I have however, been asking myself the same questions. I have a number of options: trying to extend my stay, get a similar assignment somewhere else, do contract work in the US and short assignment abroad with geekcorps or a similar organization, or try to land with a job at the UN. The appeal here is that if I work with them, the INS won’t be on my back to question my residency, while if I work with an NGO, they will (good news by the way the INS paper I need to come back to the country have arrived).

Every year, I try to learn one computer skill or two. I am not sure what I want to learn this year. There are many programming skills that appeal to me, however, most techies jobs in the developing world are for system administrator and network engineer. Perhaps I should try to gain some skills in that area. Either that or I get back on the Oracle certification track.

I have been a little disappointed in myself and in the way I live here. I think in part, it comes from my anthropological training. I tend to think of the anthropological fieldwork as the standards by which my way of living in Afghanistan should be measured. I have to remind myself that I not doing a fieldwork here. I just live here and make myself as comfortable as possible in spite of constraints placed on us due to security. That does not prevents me from being interested in the country and in meeting Afghan people (well really, Afghan men). The other part that makes me uncomfortable is to be rich by local standards and to have a guard, a cleaner and a gardener. To be perfectly honest, I am getting used to that part.

I am temporary living in the house by myself. The two Danish ladies with whom I shared the house left, and Lyn is temporary staying at a guesthouse to help a friend. I am outmanned by the chawkidars at night.

2005-04-07T15:24:00.000+04:30

Today, a shooting took place a few blocks form my office. Over the last ten days, there has been a number of fatal attacks, mostly targeted to the military. The last NGO worker to meet a violent death in Kabul was Steve Mc Queen, exactly one month ago.

More on driving in Kabul

2005-04-05T08:33:00.000+04:30

There is no such thing as traffic lights, neither is there anything like the right of way. Drivers threat every intersection as a four-way stop with the difference that they do not stop. Occasionally, a policeman is there to help guiding the traffic. Roundabouts exist but cars go around them clockwise and counter-clockwise. The absence of street signs is matched by that of any traffic signal. Signalling is, needless to say, discouraged (it’s nobody’s business where you going). To the best of my knowledge, there is not speed limit though speedbumps, potholes, donkeys, goats (and in the winter: snow and ice) do a good job of slowing cars down. Cars take over on your right and left, and to add to the confusion, the number of lanes (never painted on the asphalt) can vary depending on the inclination of the drivers. Given these conditions, it is quite admirable that there are so few incidents because there really do not appear to be many.

Last week-end

2005-04-05T08:29:00.000+04:30

More attacks over the week-end, still on military targets.

On Friday, I took part to a nice hike with Kabul Hash House Harriers. We went to an area closed to where I live where there is a nice adobe fort (I do not know when it was built). The weather was pleasantly warm, and there were plenty of goats and kids playing next to the fort and a few abandoned tanks nearby. The building had a beautiful recently built staircase that on closer inspection appeared to be made entirely out of canon shells.

On Saturday, we went to Baghram. It was nice to get out of the city although there was no much to see there. It is a small town, whose main attraction is the US military base but we could not get in. We did some shopping there and you could tell that we had just been paid because the two IT boys that were with us went on a spending spree.

In the evening, there was a farewell party for Jesper and Babak (but not really for the later because he will be back soon). Party was pleasant but most of all, I had a fun time with Babak, ordering massive amount of food from street vendors.

Sunday: Busy day at work. Another farewell drink, for one of my flatmate this time. She will be back this summer.

Shisha night

2005-04-01T08:25:00.000+04:30

I had a very pleasant night smoking shisha (waterpipe) at the DACAAR staffhouse. DACAAR provides subsidized housing to its employees. Many opt for this option, either because they are young and without family, or else because their family is not in Kabul. Either way it enables them to save some money on living expenses. For 20$ per month, charge included, DACAAR provides clean accommodations with basic facilities (four people per room), a cleaner and a guard.

Shisha is not common in Afghanistan. Certainly less so that many places in the Middle East, and even less than in neighboring Pakistan. The only establishment I know where one can smoke shisha in Kabul is an Iranian restaurant. There are also one or two shops selling shishas and accessories (tobacco, special coal and pre-cut sheet of aluminium to put between the tobacco and the coal. I hear that in Pakistan, where shisha has always been smoked (I am not sure how frequently), it is even becoming a little bit of a fad to smoke for young trendies like ourselves (not).

It is a cliché to say that in many muslim countries certain demonstrations of physical affections between men are considered totally acceptable and have nothing to do with being gay. This is very true in Afghanistan. It is not uncommon for men to hold hands (whereas I have yet to see a man and a woman holding hand in public). Last night, I was surprised to see how two of the guys kept holding and touching each other.

Somebody told us that Mazar is renowned for having the best hashish in the world. Now you tell me! Before I was told this, I thought we had had a great trip. It is obvious now, that our drug free visit was an abysmal failure. Apparently, in some part of Kabul, it is not uncommon for stores to sell hashish under the counter apparently.

I actually found some good DVDs. I mean, not just Hollywood mainstream. We are talking Almodovar and Kurosawa here! Of course, some of them have some flaws. Most discs contain five films. Inevitably one or two do not work properly. Also another DVD (special japanese cinema) contained an American series that bore no similarities whatsoever with the advertised content. A friend of mine got a DVD whose subtitles clearly belonged to another movie. Oh yes, I wrote recently that one could buy software releases that do not even exist. You can also purchase movies that do no exist (Star War IV, Toy Story III).

2005-03-31T08:20:00.000+04:30

Piracy: things are so bad here that both the Dell representative and a Microsoft Certified Solution Provider recommended to DACAAR to buy one copy of the software and to install it on all machines.

Nothing much to report. The week was uneventful. Several important news in Afghanistan however (and I don’t mean Laura Bush’s visit). Firstly, a dam burst in Ghazni, two hours south of Kabul. Many houses have been destroyed by the flood that ensued, and important agricultural areas are now under water. DACAAR has many projects in the area. I think they took part in the repairs of the dam as well, but not to the part that collapsed. Secondly, another bomb attack, the third in the last ten days. Each attack was aimed at a military target and we are not in immediate danger. Perhaps the season has started again. Last but not least, there is a new legislation that was just passed that might make life very difficult for NGOs.

About a year ago, there was a change in the funding mechanism for humanitarian aid. Instead of giving the money to NGOs directly, major donors (like USAID, the European Union, etc.) provide the money to the Afghan government, which then invite NGOs to bid on specific projects. This mechanism was designed to strengthen the Afghan government, and although it does cause significant problems in the meantime (NGO complaints funds take much longer to get to them, some people in the field get accused of stealing funds and are threatened, etc.), Afghanistan is a sovereign state and it makes good sense that they should decide which projects get funded and who is in charge of their implementation.

A few days ago, a new legislation was passed. Most people have not actually seen the legislation so what I am describing is from people from have heard it from others people. Initially, it seems that the law was aimed at preventing NGOs to contract in building jobs. It would appear that in its final form, the law prevents the government to do any new contract with NGOs. This is not good news for anybody. You have to understand that without NGOs, there would be little or no drinking water, little or no healthcare, no equitable credit to poor farmers (except if they grow opium), etc. You might be thinking, “this might be true, but shouldn’t the Afghan government be leveraged to the point where they can take these functions over?” It should. Unfortunately, the current state is in no shape to fill most of these functions. The sadest part (beside the fact program recipients will be the one to suffer) is that this will not in any way strengthen the Afghan state. What will happen instead, is that contract that currently go to non-profit NGOs will go to for-profit private contractors, and that, I don’t see how it serve any purpose whatsoever.

Note 4/4/2005: It seems that the legislation will be amended. The aim of the legislation was to enable the private sector to contribute to building contracts

2005-03-28T15:32:00.000+04:30

Last week-end was uneventful. I went to a hash, but it was raining which took some fun out of the event. We went next to the Darulaman Palace (also known as the King’s Palace) and to the Queen’s palace. There are talks of restoring the King’s Palace so that the parliament can be hosted there, but the building has much suffered from the war and is in pitiful shape. I doubt this is going to happen anytime soon.

We watched a few bad films during the week-end as well (there are many DVDs available but good movies are hard to come by). One of them was Rambo III, which we chose because it takes place in Afghanistan. The anti-Soviet propaganda is pretty extreme. There was a buzkashi scene in the film.

In the local stores, most DVDs, by far, are Bollywood movies. Indian music is also popular here. Another attraction of these films is the presence of Indian babes among the cast, and after two and half months here seeing mostly burkas in the street, even I think that this is reason enough to watch them. One of the IT boys (as we call the young IT technicians in the office) collects postcards of Indian actresses. According to what I read, in the seventies, some women wore miniskirts in Kabul. It is hard to imagine today.

There was an explosion next to Supreme supermarket today. At least two persons (Afghans) were wounded in the attack. It is not yet clear if it was caused by a mine or by a rocket. The store is located next to an ISAF based and is frequented exclusively by foreigners, including by a large number of soldiers. It is therefore a prime target. This is not good news. It might also be a sign that there are more bombs to come. We all go to Supreme when we need to buy alcohol or overpriced western goods (for instance: trash bags).

Mazar-i Sharif

2005-03-24T08:31:00.000+04:30

We got the ok to go to Mazaar from the DACAAR’s director, who has been living in the country for thirty years. In fact, not only did he give his approval, he gave us permission to use a DACAAR car, and a driver (whom we paid, naturally). However, part of our crew talked to others members of DACAAR’s management who were adamant that it was dangerous and strongly advised them not to go. As a result, within the space of a day, our group shrunk from six people to two. Babak and I debated the matter at length for a solid minute before deciding that we were far too young and foolish not to go. We also had talked to others folks who thought it was ok. In retrospect, I really think it was quite a safe trip.
I am glad we went by car with a local driver (as NGO workers we could have got a free flight, which we initially planned to do). We got on extremely well with Hafiz, our driver, who also seemed to have the time of his life. I even think we made some jealous back at DACAAR because his colleagues kept calling him to see how he was doing and he took a visible pleasure in telling them what we were up to. Hafiz also had a knack to talk our way through places whose access was normally restricted. Every time a soldier barred access to a site, he kept arguing until we got in. In fact that was a lesson for us: here you should never take no for an answer. He did not speak much english at all. Babak’s persian skills came in handy. Generally, with bits of Persian, Dari, Turkish and English, loads of good will and strong guessing skills, we managed to communicate quite effectively.

It took us only eight hours to go to Mazaar. Against all expectations, the road was actually quite good. It is quite a scenic drive. We passed, green valleys, terrace fields, orchards, and villages with rows of men crouching and looking at the landscape. Local crops include wheat, some rice, and various fruits. According to an agronomist we met, every village tends to have a small poppy field somewhere but this is not part of the country’s main opium producing areas. Of course, it is Afghanistan, and there is always something, be it a minefield warning, a soviet era tank carcass, a tank chain used as street bump, or a one-legged man, to remind you of twenty-five years of war. The Soviet invaded using this road. More recently, in 1997, the region was fought over by the Taliban and two local warlords, Dostum and Abdul Mallik. It is alleged that the later perpetrated atrocities on Taliban prisoners and it is an established fact that the Taliban massacred Hazaras and Uzbeks when they conquered Mazar-I Sharif in 1998 (they also destroyed villages and orchards in the area). There has been also some serious mishandling (euphemism) of Taliban prisoners by the Northern Alliance (backed by the US) in 2001. I have been told that Mazar-I Sharif once famous covered market was destroyed during the war. Other than that, to the outsider, it appears that the city itself was not very damaged and many of its historical sites remain intact.

Mazar draws in large crowds for Newroz, yet, hotels were not full (most visitors stay with friends and family). Right in the center of town, we came into the self proclaimed ***** Bharat hotel (more like * IMHO) to ask for directions, and to our surprise they had rooms available. We did eventually manage to make a reservation ahead of time to the UNICA, UN’s guest house. It took us forever to find the place (it is located closed to others UN offices) and I will post the contact details shortly, should a traveler read this page. UN’s guest houses are designed to accommodate UN staff, but in practice, they do accept guests from NGOs and foreign embassies if they have space available. We paid $35 for a huge room with three double beds which is very cheap (despite being a poor country, hotels are quite expensive in Afghanistan). If you plan to travel there, do check ahead of time, because their pricing policies are very inconsistent. UNICA had good security, a lovely garden, a great buffet and a very British bar (with its marvelously distasteful green and golden wallpaper).

There was a lot of security in Mazar and on the road leading to it. There were frequent checkpoints, some roads blocked, and hundreds of soldiers with automatic weapons and rocket propelled grenades. It is more questionable if they were at all useful, since we got in everywhere without having been frisked.

On Sunday, we first went to the Amu Darya (Oxys River), right at the border with Uzbekistan. We were vaguely hoping to cross but there was no way they would let us in without a visa and it takes six weeks to obtain one. Babak and I decided to try to go to Uzbekistan this summer. In the afternoon, we went to Balkh, a city next to Mazar that dominated the region for nearly three thousands years, but which was destroyed by Genghis Khan. We also saw the Hajji Piyada Mosque, the remains of a 9th century monument built to honor a man who walked to Mecca and back seven times (which begs the question: why on earth did he not stay there?).

Dress code is pretty conservative in Mazar. With rare exceptions, men wear shalwar kameez and women they burka. Men have also a more Central Asian attire: many wear the turban, and some wear the a long cotton green and blue coat. Some clothes acts as ethnic and regional marker (Hafiz liked to tell us where people were from based on their dress). Mazar population consists of Pashtuns, Uzbeks, Tadjiks and Hazaras. We had been recommended to wear a shalwar kameez and this turned out to be good advice. It is not that we passed as Afghans, but it made us less conspicuous.

For eating, we went to local kebab houses. In Mazar, typically, these houses have a dirt floor. Either on the floor or on a platform is a vinyl sheet and some carpet or cushion. People eat cross legged and bare foot, sitting on the cushions, and eating with their hands.

Late afternoon, we went to the Shrine of Hazrat Ali (blue mosque). In the 7th century, Hazrat Ali, cousin and son-in-law of the prophet- was assassinated. It was feared that his body would be desecrated and to prevent this, his followers exhumed his remain and carried them on a white camel. A few weeks later, the camel died from exhaustion and his remains were buried on that place. The mosque was built on that location (I should precise that the mosque is built in honor of Hazrat Ali, not in honor of the camel, although the later is presumably buried at the same place). The original building was destroyed by dear Genghis and the current mosque dates back from the 15th century. I have seen many but it is without a doubt, one of the most magnificent I have ever seen. That alone would have been worth the trip. The mosque is actually a fairly large complex that includes several buildings. There are many doves all around. The story goes that these are ugly pigeons that get transformed into doves when they fly over the mosque. In the evening, we came back to the area also. Instead of using flashlights, locals put blinking lights all around the building. It was cheesy like hell (see picture).

Newroz also attracted a number of beggars, healers and story tellers.

On Monday, the crowds were everywhere. There was an opening ceremony that included president Kazaai and several dignitaries. We missed it because they performed the ceremony two hours earlier than scheduled due to some security concerns. Hafiz did not want us to get close to the event either because he thought it was dangerous. Canons were fired (we were slightly troubled until we knew what it was). People were climbing on trees and standing on top of roofs to see what was happening.

Mazaar is famous for its Buzkashi games and we couldn’t miss that. It was very different from the game I saw in Kabul. There were easily 10,000 spectators and one hundred or so horses, even some donkeys! People were standing, sitting on the floor or on top of minivans. It was most confusing. People kept creeping into the playing area. Not only that but cars, motorcycles and bikes would cross in the middle of the field. When the players started to gallop in the direction of the spectators, they would run away in panic. In fact, if we face any danger at all during our trip, it was that of being caught in a stampede. I heard conflicting explanations about the game. According to one, there are no teams in Mazaar’s Buzkashi, it is every man for himself. According to another, the buzkashi we saw was a competition among several teams (more than two). I am extremely doubtful that many viewers actually follow the game closely enough to keep track of the score. It is just way too chaotic.

In the evening, there was a music festival. We heard some Iranian, Uzbek, Tadjik and Afghan performers. In all but one concert, the audience was exclusively male. It was rather intriguing to look at the men who were dancing. To a western audience, their movements made them look very effeminate.

On the way back we stopped to look at a site whose name escape me for now and at Surkh Kotal. Finding the later was an adventure that we could not have done without a professional driver and a 4WD. We eventually found the place. There was however, not much to see except for the beautiful landscape. All kids of the village came to greet us. Each of them gave us a two hands handshake (I might have said that already but people are VERY polite in Afghanistan).

Unfortunately, we got stuck just before the Salang tunnel for five and half hours on the way back. Supposedly the tunnel is open to traffic on alternate days (i.e. one day Kabul-Mazar, the next Mazar-Kabul) but this was not the case when we got back (traffic was going both ways). There was a lot of snow in that part of the road. If you are planning to go through the pass a)check which days the traffic goes b) be sure to have snow chains. Not only will you need them, but they won’t let you pass unless you have them. Sometimes, the road is blocked both ways. To make up for the loss time, Hafiz made a point to overtake every driver on the road to Kabul. Although he is very skilled, there were a few tight curves where I wouldn’t have minded him going slower. In the Salang tunnel, we encounter a very strange sighting: a westerner, by himself, traveling on his mountain bike. The guy wasn't within cycling distance from a guesthouse. It is not like you can set up a tent anywhere, the area is heavily mined and the warnings are hidden under the snow. I felt both appaled at how irresponsible this man was, and at the same time envious.

Troubling news

2005-03-24T08:27:00.000+04:30

A Pakistani guy working for DACAAR was followed as he was driving home as few days ago. He hurried home, but before he got in one of the occupants from the other car pulled a gun at him.

As if this was not bad enough, there have been reports of people being robbed shortly after they left Supreme. It is a well-secured supermarket open to expats only where alcohol and others western goods can be purchased. Afghan nationals are not allowed to buy alcohol there. We are in the Transitional ISLAMIC Republic of Afghanistan after all. In practice, many locals do drink of course, and furthermore, I don’t think they would be denied a drink in a restaurant or a bar. It is just that bars and restaurants that serve alcohol (and there is no shortage of them in Kabul) are designed to attract western customers paying in dollars.

Piracy

2005-03-24T08:26:00.000+04:30

In Afghanistan, pirated DVDs, CDs and software are available everywhere for one or two buck a piece. Software piracy is rampant. Once, while visiting the office of another organization, I have had the opportunity to witness an IT person enter a 20 characters length product key from memory! He had installed the same software (licensed for one PC) so many times that he knew it by heart. Sometimes things go too far. For instance, in any decent store, one can buy software such as Microsoft Office 2005, or Microsoft Longhorn final edition, neither of which even exists as a commercial product.

2005-03-17T10:29:00.000+03:30

I found more info. on the game of buzkashi. It is said to have been introduced by Genghis Khan. It is played with either a goat or a calf carcass. During the bad all days of the Soviet-Afghan war, one journalist has also witnessed a game played using a living soviet soldier as a goat. There are actually two different versions of the game, but it more or less boils down to the same thing: fight for the goat carcass, do a little dance with it around a flag and drop it in a designated area. Since it became the national sport, there is an Afghanistan Buzkashi Federation that established some rules. They made the game considerably blander by banning the use of weapons, or even that of a whip to intentionally hit an opponent. They also limited the number of players to ten per team.

After tomorrow, a group of us is going to Mazar-e Sharif, a city up North, close to the border with Uzbekistan and Turkmenistan. On March 21st, falls Newroz, a large persian festival, rooted in the traditions of Zoroastrian religion. It is one of the main celebration of the year. Mazar-e Sharif is the place to be at that time, and large crowds come to the city to celebrate. I don’t know exactly why people go specifically to Mazar, but I guess it must have something to do with the fact it is historically a Zoroastrian center.

Organizing our trip is not as easy as it seems. Among others problems is the accommodation. It is bad enough that we decided the trip very late and that all hotels are probably booked. But how do you go about booking a hotel anyway? You call and give your credit card number to hold the room, right? Try again. First, I have yet to see a business that accept credit card here. Second, I don’t know the hotels phone number. It’s not like there is a directory assistance you can use to look them up. I managed to find a description of several hotels but no contact details. At any rate, I won't be able to blog or check my email until Wed 23.

I have been learning Dari for a month and half or so, and my progress are disappointingly slow. I probably don’t dedicate enough time and effort to it. There is also not much material available to learn this language. I have yet to find a decent dictionary and I not even sure that one exists. The ones that are available are pretty thin glossaries written in latin script. I decided to learn Dari using persian script, although this turns out to be less useful than I expected. I thought naively that knowing the alphabet would help with me tasks such as reading street signs. Since I have been here, I have seen exactly one street sign.

Paghman

2005-03-14T10:05:00.000+03:30

On Saturday, a group of us (Afghans and foreigners) went to Paghman. Before we left Kabul we passed two areas of interest. One was the Sikh neighborhood. There is a native Sikh minority in Afghanistan. Under the Taliban they were heavily repressed and forced to wear distinctive clothing. Sounds familiar?. The other was a neighborhood surprisingly tidy, full of new and shiny building. Houses were built in the new afghan style, with marble facades, colored glasswork and decorated iron gates. Others sightings of interest on the way to Paghman included bullet-ridden buildings, lovely adobe villages, less lovely minefields (marked with white and red stones) and the ever present decorated Pakistani trucks.

Once at destination we went for a hike, or as much hike as we could manage since the area still had snow so deep it was reaching our thighs. It was very pleasant and beautiful. We also had ate some freshly made yoghurt that we bought from a local peasant.

For the rest of the day, we ate some of the best kebabs I have had in Kabul, in a small afghan restaurant. Half of the place was occupied by tables; the rest was a room in which people sat on the floor.

We visited the remains of the mausoleum of King Nadir Shah and his family and later we also went to the bazaar that was crowded, colorful and noisy like any self-respecting middle-eastern market.

Buzkashi

2005-03-13T12:42:00.000+03:30

On Friday, I was lucky enough to see a Buzkashi, the national afghan sport.
It is a team sport, although it is not obvious to the outsiders since neither side wears any uniform. Every player has a horse and the game consists in getting a headless goat carcass from the center of the field, running around a flag pole with it, then dropping it inside a designated area. Of course, there is a rugby like quality to the event, as every player tries to grab the carcass. Last Friday, the goat was 50Kg, but it can weight up to 100Kg. Needless to say, it requires some strength to light 100Kg off the ground, with one hand, while riding a horse. Apparently one of the players even had a wooden leg! Buzkashi horses are apparently very expensive. Warlords are said to sponsor these games, and players who “score” received some amount of money (it was not very clear from whom. Probably from people betting, but there was no visible bets taking place). The field was located near the ISAF compound and the only shadow on the event was the presence of American military troops. It is fair enough that they attended but in between games, a blonde chick (need I specify, unveiled) in military gear found nothing better to than to ride one of the horses around the field. Not exactly the most culturally sensitive thing to do…

Visit to the zoo

2005-03-10T07:43:00.000+03:30

I have seen many zoos, but never a more pitiful one than Kabul’s. In its center stands a shelled out, bullet ridden building. Although most of the zoo ground is plain dirt (or more accurately in this season: mud) with nothing to see, there are a few animal exhibits near the entrance. One can see three pigs, two lions, three bears, a few monkeys and some birds. I probably omitted an animal or two but not more. To make things worse, the cages were glaringly inadequate. The poor bears had only green stagnant water to bathe into.

I went there with an international group, and for locals, we were quite an attraction ourselves, rivaling with the lions in terms of popularity.

One of the highlight of the visit was watching half dozen guards and one vet attempting to capture an injured pig to give him medicine. The event was reminiscent of a rodeo, although the pig was squealing as if it were a mantanza.

Kabul zoo used to have a one-eyed lame lion called Manja who gained a certain notoriety during the civil war. According to the most common version of the story, a Taliban fighter wanted to have a picture of himself next to the lion and got into the cage. Unfortunately for him, the lion ate him. A few days later, the deceased’ family came to avenge the death of their family member (as one does in this part of the world) and threw a grenade into the cage. The lion survived but lost an eye as a result. According to another version of the story, it was a starving man who threw the grenade into the cage, intending to eat lion for supper. As he got into the cage, a surprised awaited him: the lion was still alive and waiting for a snack… Whatever version of the story you believe, that lion is now dead.

In the zoo, we witnessed some gathering. People were buying hard boiled eggs painted in red and used them to compete with one another. Apparently, the game consisted in hitting your egg against your opponent’s. The person whose egg breaks first loses.

More into for the killing

2005-03-08T13:27:00.000+03:30

We got a little more info. on the killing last night. It was clearly a targetted killing execution style (see press report). The whole thing happened at a location five minutes from our home despite the presence of half-dozen guards with AK47 nearby. It is unclear whether he was killed because of this work affiliation with the Ministry of Rehabilitation and Development or if he was involved in some personal business he shouldn't have been. According to the bbc "He was working on a rural credit scheme, one of its aims being to reduce the dependence of farmers on growing opium." Would that be a motive for opium traders to kill him? Who knows?

Meanwhile, DACAAR follows the recommendation from the Afghanistan Non-Governmental Organisation Security Office (ANSO) and we just got a memo that reads "All expatriate staff must restrict unnecessary movement in Kabul city after 20.00 hours." Bummer. What happened to DACAAR's approach of advising us, rather than telling us what to do? I find that the meaning of the terms "restrict" and "unnecessary" is quite ambiguous. According to the Miriam-Webster, to restrict is to "to confine within bounds". Which bounds are these? As for uncessary, what if going out is necessary for our mental health. I shouldn't talk lightly about these issues, I know, but we are concerned as to how long this state of affair is going to last.

Update March 10, 2005:

There are many more rumors and speculations circulating in Kabul about the Scott.'s assasination. I am not going to turn this into a gossip column, but suffice to say that some of these stories make it very credible that it was an act of personal revenge, not a terrorist attack. Having said that, the Taliban did claim responsability for the attack but security analysts are doubful that they would still have the means to carry such an attack. Besides they often claim responsability for acts they did not commit.

Afghanistan is still dangerous

2005-03-08T10:22:00.000+03:30

This week, two incidents reminded us that Afghanistan can still be a dangerous place.

First, an acquaintance of Penilla (one of my housemate) was involved in an incident in which her family was attacked in broad daylight in the center of town by four armed men who beat up the car and its occupants. Apparently they did so because “the mother was a whore” (whatever that means) and it seem pretty clear that it was a family dispute or some sort. The victims claim it was simply a carjacking, but their story does not hold water.

The second event happened last night. I went to the elbow room (an expat hangout) with two of my housemates and one other person. Today, we learnt that one expat who was there talking to Lyn, was shot dead at around 10pm. Nobody knows if it was a personal vendetta or a terrorist act (probably it matters little to the victim, but the implications are different to us), although there are speculations that it was a targeted killing. There are a number of well-armed guards in the immediate vicinity of the crime scene, which makes it unlikely that it was a random mugging. We’ll have to wait to see how it affects our safety guidelines.

I also feel guilty for another reason. At around eleven, all of us but Lyn wanted to go home. I took the car and drove the ladies I was with to their respective residences, leaving Lyn behind. I did not feel bad about that because she was with someone whom I know had a driver, and I figure he could give her a lift. Later she called me to ask me if I was still up and if I could pick her up (the guy’s driver was nowhere to be found). I would have done it (I was in bed though) had I known for sure how to get there, but I didn’t (I don’t know my way around Kabul well). As it turns out, Lyn and her friend walked to get a taxi exactly to the same area that the guy was shot.

It takes some efforts not to become complacent about safety issues here because we don’t feel insecure at all on a daily basis. Just because a place “feel” safe does not mean it is. Albuquerque has a crime rate about twice the US average, and there is a serious shooting incident every year or two in front of the university. Yet, I have never felt unsafe there.

It may also be that we have to come to terms with the sad fact that some insecurity is part of life. There were bombs going off and others terrorist acts when I was in Brussels (several bombs by the CCC, including one that did not go off accross the street from my house), Manchester (the IRA blew up a shopping center), Turkey (Islamic fundamentalist and/or PKK), London (the IRA blew up Canary Whorf), Northern Ireland (Real IRA's bombing in Ormagh), Israel (attacks on buses by Hamas) and the US (9/11). Basically everywhere I went to.

In terms of security, DACAAR is among the loosest organization in here. Expats live in houses protected by unarmed guards, carry a cell phone at all time and need clearance before traveling out of town. Other than that, we drive ourselves wherever we want to go. We get security recommendations but it is up to us to follow them. Many other People who work for others NGOs often have a curfew, are forbidden to go to parts of the city, only travel with a driver, and some must carry a radio (which is pointless since the cell phone reception is fine in Kabul). The worse off are UN workers who are under stricter regulations. Worse still (but these are not NGO folks) are those associated with the military (contractors and soldiers). They are usually locked down in the military base. If they do go out, they tend to do so by group, all carrying arms and visibly looking at the world around them as if there was a sniper posted on every street corner.

I need to tell of an anecdote that I got from Lyn. Lyn manages a development program. During a meeting, representatives from each region had to relate the situation on the ground. One man described the security situation in his district as fine, locals having no problem with DACAAR. That was surprisingly good news because it was a very conservative pasthoon area where more difficult relations can be expected. Later, it came up in the conversation that someone fired a rocket at the house of the DACAAR’s female worker, Somehow this unimportant detail was omitted from his presentation of the security situation.

Misc.

2005-03-08T10:21:00.000+03:30

Mobile phone retailers, English and Computer classes, gyms and beauty parlors are all booming businesses in Kabul. You can expect to find one of each in each neighborhood. Of course you can see many more grocers, street carts, pharmacies and barbers but I don’t think these are new.

From what I gather, the weather in Afghanistan is like this: in the Winter, it is bitterly cold and snowy, in the Spring it is rainy and muddy and in the Summer it is dusty and too hot (buildings don’t have AC). I don’t know about Fall so there is still hope.

Cars

2005-03-08T10:19:00.000+03:30

Now that the weather is warming up, a few horses can be seen in the street. Either they are ridden or they are pulling heavy wooden carts with two automobile wheels at the bottom (although by far, most such carts are man powered).

Kabul is Toyota country. One can see a few Benz and some Ladas, but the overwhelmingly popular cars are Toyotas, especially the Townace minibus and the Corrolla, of any age and shape. They other day, I was counting the Corrollas and they composed something like 60% of the cars on the roads. I know they are good cars (I just sold mine) but I don’t know why there isn’t more diversity of vehicles. It would be a good commercial “Only the Toyota Corrolla is robust enough to drive on the beat up Afghan roads.” The main exceptions are the big ass 4x4 vehicles that belong to the UN or to others NGOs.

While on the topic of car, ours (guess which brand and model? A Toyota Corrolla) had a flat tire for the second time in the space of a month. It happened when Lyn was driving it so I wasn’t there to help (which might be just as because I don’t know how well I would have done).

In Kabul, the police does not tow illegally park vehicles, neither do they clamp the wheels. Instead, they ingeniously let the air out of two tires.

Work

2005-03-08T10:17:00.000+03:30

I haven’t been so little stressed about work in recent memory. In the past, one of the difficult things about work was to manage to work on several concurrent projects while simultaneously providing support to end-users, attending meetings and “managing” others people. Here I have the luxury to more or less concentrate on one project at a time and I am not too pressured for deadlines either (truth be told, most people don’t have a clue as to what it takes to develop a software so they go with whatever I tell them). Whenever somebody does come to me with an urgent problem to fix, he is usually so apologetic about disturbing me that it is almost embarrassing. And I should add that my boss is happy with my work as well. The challenge will be to remain motivated. So far, the job still has enough novelty to keep me interested but it is pretty easy and I can foresee getting frankly bored in the future. I have been lobbying for a major system upgrade that might make work more challenging for me.

My boss expects that I will leave them with a working system that manages itself, and I had to break it to her that this is not the way things go in IT. Qualified staff will be needed to administer and maintain the product of my labor. My job description include the word “capacity building”, however, management has been quite elusive as to what this means. Our stated long term objective is to “afghanise” the workforce (i.e. to get Afghans to replace international staff) but DACAAR is also reluctant to provide much training because once the IT staff is trained, they take a better paying job and bye bye. You could argue that even if they do leave, training qualified staff is a service provided to the country anyway, but in the meantime our organization get screwed. Another problem is the lack of high level technical training offered in Afghanistan (some of our staff take distance education courses from Pakistan).

2005-03-03T09:11:00.000+03:30

In Aghanistan, dollars and Aghanis are used interchangeably. Even your grocery store around the corner accepts US Dollars (its owner won't have a cash register but he probably will have a calculator handy to do the conversion). "Luxury" items (for instance prepaid cards for cell phones) have a price tag in USD.

According to yahoo finance, the exchange rate of the dollars to the Afghanis has remained totally unchanged for the last two years. I suppose this means that the Afghan monetary system is based on US currency.

2005-02-27T14:17:00.000+03:30

The word on the street is that DACAAR is in dire financial straits and that the organization will need to undergo drastic changes in order to accommodate to changing NGO funding mechanisms.

2005-02-25T13:11:00.000+03:30

One of my afghan colleagues invited a few of us, foreigners, to drive to one of Kabul’s dams. The view of the snowy mountains was spectacular and we had a great time walking in the snow and (more foolishly perhaps) on the ice. Later, four of our afghan colleagues came to join us. It was very nice.

One of the strange sights to be found in Afghanistan is that of abandoned shipping containers. They are usually in the middle of nowhere and you can’t help but wonder how they got there in the first place. We even saw an adobe house built around one.

In the afternoon, I took part in a hash. The hash (not to be confused with the local pharmacopoeia of the same name. The full name is Hash House Harriers) is, short of a better description, a traditional hiking society with a drinking edge. The whole thing sounds very British to me, although the group itself was international. We walked around a soviet built hospital complex, then passed some villages. The view of the adobe houses and of the wheat (?) fields with the mountains as the backdrop was wonderful. A funeral was taking place in the village. There was a procession, with at the front, four men carrying a bamboo bed on which lay the deceased covered by a blanket. A large chanting crowd was following.

For the next part of the trail, we had difficulties due to the slippery, ankle-deep puddles of mud. Some of us eventually, abandoned the “road” altogether and climbed the hill leading us to our destination instead. We passed a cemetery on the way. Many of the tombstones were literally that: a simple flat stone with some inscription painted on it. A green flag decorates the tomb of men who led pious lives.

We arrived panting to the top of the hill were stood the remains of an olympic size swimming pool built by the Soviets. We had perfect view on Kabul, the mountain (snowy on one side, earth colored on the other), the airport, the palace, the intercontinental hotel, etc. I don’t know how they built the pool, but today there isn’t even a decent road to get to it and it looks utterly absurd. Kids were playing soccer in the empty pool and nearby, next to an abandoned tank (there aren’t too many of those, but a few can be seen in and around Kabul).

I saw many women today and the large majority of them wore burka (the rest wore only headscarves). And that’s in and around Kabul, I would imagine that the burka would be more prevalent in some of the provinces. Interestingly, wearing the burka does not preclude wearing high heels in some cases. Burkas did not end with the Taliban.

Spring is coming

2005-02-24T13:08:00.000+03:30

The weather is definitely warming up. Spring is coming. At last! The snow is melting in our garden revealing the lovely sight of piles of dirt and heaps of garbage (there is naturally no garbage collection in Kabul. We have been waiting for somebody to pick up the trash and bring it to the dump for a while now). The snow melting on dirt roads is creating mud all over town, making it harder to walk or drive. But roads are terrible anyway. An amusing detail is that I know of no city where there are more speed bumps than Kabul, and yet, I know of no place where they are less needed: between the potholes, the mud, the improvised garbage dumps and the ditch that serves as a gutter, it is impossible to go fast. Cars do take a beating here, and the fact that some Soviet-era Skoda are still in use speaks volume about the talents of afghans mechanics.

Today, instead of going to Dacaar’s cafetaria, I went to an expat restaurant (Flower Street Café). A rather pleasant place, though nothing fancy. There we ate very good sandwiches. On the way back to work, we stopped at a small afghan shop to buy some cookies that were amazingly cheap. We calculated that for the price of one sandwich, we could have bought 9Kg of cookies. Nine kilos! The disparity in wealth in this country is unbelievable.
In the evening, we went to a party (Thursday night is the big night out, since everybody is off on Friday). Getting there was actually more interesting than the party itself. Every car was following another car, although nobody knew where to go. The roads were pretty bad and we got stuck in the mud. It was an NGO party again, this time hosted by a French organization. Clearly, they were not geared for the number of people who showed up, and shortly after we came, they only let people in if there were on the guest list. I had rsvp’ed, without having ever been invited. Anyway, it was nothing special, crowd of people packed in a room in the basement, dancing, drinking or smoking hash. Alcohol was in short supply and the party was rather dull really, but I had a good time talking with my friends nonetheless.
I have been told today that I look strikingly like a Serbian actor. Some time ago, it was an Afghan pop star. It is difficult to escape the conclusion that I must have a very common face.

There are aspects of our life here that are reminiscent of college life. We live in a shared house, meet only single people who are roughly our age (none of whom have kids), and go to parties every weeks (or for some people, who shall remain nameless, every day).

Work

2005-02-23T13:49:00.000+03:30

I have done something stupid at work and I am still dealing with its repercussions. Yesterday, somebody from a ministry came to discuss our possible participation to their “Electronic Afghanistan Project.” That project consists in putting as much information on Afghanistan as possible online, and since DACAAR possess a lot of useful information, it was natural that they ask for our help. They wanted to get an idea of what our database structure was, it order to see if it would be possible to integrate the data we have with that of others agencies.

I understood that we were collaborating with this guy more than we actually were, and to cut a long story short, I gave him a copy of one of our database. It was rather poor judgment on my part, naturally. Not being a complete idiot (admittedly I came pretty close), I did require from him assurances that he would not use the data without our prior consent, which he has since put in writing. Basically I don’t think it is too bad. I think that it is in our interest to contribute to this project if it ever takes off the ground, and he gave us guarantee that they would wait for our approval before doing anything to the data. However, people in some departments did not see it this way. Management was already heard of the fiasco, and it has taken meetings and efforts to find a situation everybody would be comfortable with.

I have been working with Microsoft Access for a month and I now developed a love-hate relationship with the software: it doesn’t scale for shit, it is pathetically unstable and yet, it is so user-friendly it is almost irritating. I lost whatever little respect I had for Access developers: this stuff is so easy! Ok, I shouldn’t get too cocky because I certainly have a lot more to learn, but it is possible to build in minutes forms that would take hours to develop on the web (my background). I guess the internet is still not a very mature environment, although it is slowly getting there.

Since this blogg is the place for my witty and informative comments on life in Kabul I am going to share some observations I made from buying groceries: bread is almost for nothing, fruits and vegetables are very cheap, but canned products and imported goods are relatively pricey. The odd thing though is that as far as I have been able to observe, people really don’t eat many vegetables here (though they do eat salad).

Ashura

2005-02-19T13:46:00.000+03:30

Today is marked by the celebration of Ashura, one of the holiest days of the Shiite calendar. Believers march or in some case flagellate themselves to commemorate the death of Hussein, grandson of the Prophet Mohammad.

It makes me very sad that I haven’t been able to see much of it. This was due to a combination of not managing to join a group, not wanting to go alone, not knowing where to go and having a car that did not start that day. The little I saw was from my neighborhood (which is not especially a Shiia neighborhood), although I also heard from people who have been able to observe more than I have.

Anybody who has watched CNN’s reports on the Ashura celebration in Iraq or Iran, expect to encounter an angry mob ready to destroy anything on its way and people flagellating themselves with sharp blades. Ashura in Kabul was nothing like that. Most (though not all) Shiias in Afghanistan are Hazaras, who form only a minority in this city, which might be why they toned the celebration down.

In town, I saw some cars and motorcycles, brandishing black or green flag with Persian writing on them, sometimes with some loudspeaker on top of the car. Deep in Shiia neighborhood, one could see in some mosques circles of people beating their chest and chanting, but all in a friendly and peaceful atmosphere, I was told. I heard that in one mosque, there were some scenes of gore, but I haven’t met any first hand witness.

2005-02-18T13:48:00.000+03:30

Today, I turned down a couple of invitations to do my nerdy things at home (basically studying Dari). I decided that learning Dari has got to be my first priority since, only when I will be able to speak some dary get richer interactions with afghans. Granted I am bad at practising what I know but that's mostly because the extend of my knowledge of Dari is "Today I am in the office. Who is in the office?"

Just another evening, another week

2005-02-17T13:45:00.000+03:30

Thursday night is the big night out (since almost everybody has Friday off) and we went to an Iranian restaurant tonight. I like it because in addition to having very good food, it also is the only establishment I know in Kabul that actually looks like a restaurant. This is not to say that others places are not be nice, posh even, but there is always something broken, an ad hoc lighting system in the restroom, a flakey generator, or some other detail to remind you that you are in makeshift restaurant somewhere in the third-world.

When we got there, we immediately noticed a few men in uniform standing at the entrance, as well as a herd of black Benz parked in front of the restaurant. We took that as a cue that something official was going on, and indeed we caught a glimpse of the Agriculture minister who was leaving the premises.

On this occasion, we primarily came to the restaurant to drink tea and smoke shisha (waterpipe). I did not smoke though because I kicked that habit over a year ago and do not want to start again. The group consisted of three expats (including your narrator), two afghans, and a Pakistani couple. The later were especially interesting. Obviously they were part of an educated elite. The man talked much about politics. His younger girlfriend was more into piercing and having fun. Body piercing is not something one typically associates with Pakistan, and I found myself wishing that “she” would be more different from “us”, which I have absolutely no right to do since naturally “she” has the right to be just as [fill the blanks] as “we” are. When traveling, you often encounter elites who see Westernization as a salvation from their own society, which they consider oppressive. Since you travel in part because you are looking for something your own society does not provide, this kind of encounters are destined to be disappointing.

I hadn’t had dinner so, I ate, and it was rather uncomfortable to eat in front of some people (such as my 21 year old boss) who probably couldn’t afford a meal there. To make things worse, I suffered from a fine but persistent hand tremor that made it a real challenge for me to bring food from my plate to my month without spilling it all over.

On the way back we heard of a party organized by an Italian NGO and we decided to check it out. It was your typically NGO party. The building itself was located in a back street accessible from a dirt road. There were 150 people or so, virtually all Whites (expect for 2-3 Asians, 2 Blacks, an Iranian and a Jew). The only Afghan present were the chawkidar (guard) and two drivers. Almost everybody was smoking (usually tobacco), which made the air inside almost unbreathable. I had the opportunity to put my (naturally deficient) social skills to the test. In fact, I had some nice chats with a few people, danced a little and I also helped myself generously to the bar. Overall a good night out.

2005-02-17T10:43:00.000+03:30

Unlucky me! One of my filling came off yesterday. It is quite large. I don't know if I will be able to wait twelve months before getting dental care. I might have to visit a dentist in Peshawar.

I started to take Dari lessons. It is quite hard, because it takes me a lot of effort to learn in a different alphabet, but I am very enthusiastic about it and can't wait until the next class.

Chawkidars

2005-02-14T10:37:00.000+03:30

Our house is surrounded by three meter high barbwired walls. It is also protected by one or two chawkidars (“guards”). They stay next to the entrance in a wooden shack whose comfort level is somewhere in between that of a dog house and that of a shed. Within this small space, they cram a gas heater, a stove, and a few cushions. Their primary duty is to provide security. In that respect, employing them is unavoidable: any international staff lives in a house that is at least as protected as ours. The chawkidars also performs a number of additional duties, such as collecting the sawdust for the bukharis (furnace), turning the generator on and off, etc. They might perform heavier tasks such as removing the snow from the roof (Afghan roofs are not snow proof), but this is more controversial, and I have seen them arguing that it was not their job to do so.

On most days, we eat naan for breakfast. Breakfast is not a formal affair in our house. If we have time, we drink coffee and eat some naan covered with honey or peanut butter, standing in the kitchen. Today, my housemate asked me “Don’t you like naan for breakfast?” I knew of course, that it was her very polite way to ask “Why didn’t you get the naan this time, you lazy bum?” A very valid question, indeed. "Getting the naan" consists in asking the chawkidar to buy it for us. So far, I had been too embarrassed to ask him to embark on the perilous two hundred meters journey through ice, slow and slush that separates our house from the “bakery.” When the naan is there, I eat it with appetite, naturally. I just pretend not to know how it got on the kitchen counter. My hypocrisy has no bounds.

Today, I “dirtied my own hand.” I walked to the guard and asked him if he could get me a naan. He was a little disconcerted but not for the reasons you might expect. “One naan, not two?” he asked.

On a more serious note, two hundred and something DACAAR field employees were fired today. This was due to financial problems and changing donors requirements.

Driving lessons in Kabul

2005-02-12T15:29:00.000+03:30

Like many people who learn how to drive in America, I only know how to drive a car with automatic transmission. Here, all cars have manual transmission and today I had my first driving lesson. We started going back and forth in the back streets adjacent to the house. Naturally, the whole driving lesson did not go unnoticed in the neighborhood, and kids and adults alike were watching the whole scene, amused. Then we decided to follow a path we had never taken before to see where it would lead us, and this was not, I emphasize not, the thing to do. The “path” quickly disintegrated into an accumulation of ice and mud forming a highly irregular terrain with half-erased car tracks over it. Things were getting worse as it progressed and more than once, I thought the car was going to tip over, but the real miracle is that we didn’t get stuck in one of the many mud holes.

Later I actually drove in town. Kabul is not exactly the easiest place to learn how to drive. Besides the chaos, there are immense potholes, giant ice blocks, poorly designed street bumps, an undetermined number of lanes, and naturally the prevailing traffic code (which is basically a local variation of the law of the jungle). I stalled six times in front of a bus, and at least once (let’s not sell myself so short, it was probably two or three times), in the middle of a busy roundabout. somehow, I made it though.

Bukharis

2005-02-10T07:38:00.000+03:30

Yesterday, one of my housemate got sick. The pipes of her bukhari (furnace) got clogged and her room filled with smoke (which she inhaled). She went to the hospital after she repeatedly fainted, but was discharged. She is doing better now.

The good news is that the weather is slowly getting warmer and we *shouldn't* need bukharis for much longer.

I went to a Chinese restaurant yesterday (to celebrate the Chinese new year) with a few colleagues and many others people. I’ve got to specify that this was indeed an honest establishment because in Kabul, many chinese “restaurants” are places of ill-repute where more than food is on the menu. I enjoyed talking to Jesper, a guy who lived in China for many years and speaks fluent Chinese as a result. The food was plentiful to say the least. The check was actually not so high in Western terms, although completely prohibitive by local standards.

I discussed with some others folks the possibility of traveling to Mazar-e Sharif, which is the place I wanted to go to. There is a plane but my potential traveling companions, where keener on going by road (which worries me a little).

2005-02-09T07:35:00.000+03:30

Today I had lunch at Dakaar with two visitors from Denmark, who were somewhat concerned by the possibility they might get sick from the food. I promptly reassured them by telling them I never encountered problems here. Not until long after the meal did I realize the enormity of this lie. How could I forget that everyday my guts are bubbling and screaming after every lunch? Because it is so much part of my daily routine that I don’t think about it, that’s why.

Today, I fixed a puny little database problem that had been nagging me for a few days. It is only two o’clock but I think I should leave it at that. Why not end work on a good note?

2005-02-08T10:56:00.000+03:30

I have been putting off writing about this for a while, because I did not want to disclose how corrupted I became, but here it is: We (that is me and the three girls I live with) are getting a cleaner for the house. Although I heard all of the arguments that are supposed to soothe my oh-so-wounded petit bourgeois conscience (it provides employment, it stimulates the local economy, …), I can’t manage to be completely scrupleless about it. So, I plan to be a hypocrite instead, to reap the benefits of a clean house, while claiming some moral superiority because I have some moral qualms about exploiting a cleaner. Because, even if we pay her well by local standards, I find it difficult to say that we are not exploiting her.

You may not realize, reader, that you are hardly in position to judge. Aren’t the Nikes you are wearing made in a sweat shop in Pakistan, etc? And how long has that bother you, really? But there is something more “in your face” when you hire a worker yourself. It is quite possible to live very comfortably here and to have a cook, a driver and a maid, but it is not what I came here for though.

Afghanistan is one of the poorest country in the world (all living standards indicators are horrendous) and I can only live there as a rich man, among a few middle class Afghanis and surrounded by others people who are incommensurably poorer. The challenge is to be a decent rich man by both local and one’s own standards. Of course it is greatly ironic that I am a rich man here, given that my salary is only a fraction (roughly a quarter) of what I was earning in the US, making me a little more than a bum when I’ll be back to the States.

At any rate, the first candidate came the other day. It was very interesting. The woman wore a complete burka, yet, once in our living room, she took it off in the presence of two men. She was proud to say she could use a vacuum cleaner (not your everyday afghan thing). She wanted a job because there were too many men at her current job and that made her uncomfortable. She came from Mazar-e Sharif, close to Turkmenistan. A fascinating place which I would love to visit some day.

Gloom

2005-02-08T07:32:00.000+03:30

I spent today continuously working on an Access VBA macro. At around three o’clock I was staring – not without a certain desperation – at the pitiful yield of my efforts: 50 or so lines of buggy code. In the following hour, I found a more efficient way of coding that reduced the number of lines down to fifteen. That works out just under two lines per hour. I’d hesitate to say it was a productive day.

I came here because I thought that working for an NGO would make my work, and by extension my life meaningful. It hasn’t been two weeks I am here and already I know that, although I might gain a number of things from this experience (and lose an equal number of things), it won’t give any meaning to my life nor work. I am just the same little clog in the machine, doing petty little work. Spent much of the day mulling over similar somber thoughts.

2005-02-05T07:43:00.000+03:30

Khalid, an afghan man who works at DACAAR volunteered to take me and others visitors on a tour of Kabul, which was very nice of him. I wasn’t sure he would come because there was 30cm of snow but he did.

There were perhaps less shelled houses than I expected, but mudjahedeen looted the whole city shamelessly. The communist period is not one that is remembered fondly because; the government did nothing for the people in rural area. However, in Kabul the regime did build a lot of the housing (many of which still exist today) and infrastructure. Once there was a great public transportation system. Today all that remains is a heap of busses, from which every mechanical part has been taken and sold on a market in Pakistan or Iran. There was a tramway system and good phone infrastructure, but looters have removed until the last cable. We also saw the remains of the palace, the newly remodeled Olympic stadium (infamous in Taliban time as public executions took place there), the University, etc. We saw a lot of houses. People seem either to live in Soviet style apartments, in squatter settlement build on the mountain (but there is no running water there) or squatting the remains of shelled building.

Khalid asked me why I wasn’t married (a topic I wasn’t very keen to discuss). No satisfied by my unarticulated answers, he said “You [Westerners] just worry too much about compatibility. You wait and try to see if you will get along. You should just go ahead and get married. I didn’t say a word to my wife before our wedding and we don’t have any problems.” Marriage in Afghanistan is a family affair. Traditionally, the groom’s family ask to the family of the bride to be and the proposal is either accepted or not. In progressive families, the girl is asked whether she wants to get married or not. I would imagine that in Kabul’s urban middle class, things might be a little different. But even among Kabul’s middle class division between the sexes remains. In my workplace, men and women share the same office space but I have seen women eating on their own table during lunch.

A plane from Ariana Afghan Airline flying from Kabul to Herat, crashed today. All of its occupants are presumed dead. One of Lyn’s friend was in the plane and somebody else from DACAAR should have been in the plane but wasn’t. Lyn’s face is swollen from crying. It is painful to look at her and I feel powerless about it.

UN's money

2005-02-04T07:41:00.000+03:30

I went to the restaurant again. The thing about Kabul’s restaurant is that many of them, especially restaurant for expats are located behind doors, it almost look like going to a clandestine house and they are hard to locate if you have never been there before.

Did I mention it is extremely difficult to find one’s way in Kabul? At first I thought it would be difficult because street names are written in Persian script but actually there are no sign at all. In here, you have got to break out of the habit of taking things for granted.

All this to say that we wanted to go to an Iranian restaurant, but we could not find it and we ended up going to a Thai restaurant instead. The woman who owns this restaurant has had an article written about her in the New York Times. Her business model is simple, she follows the UN. UN workers have money, she says, so as soon as they come to a country, she sets up a new restaurant. How humanitarian.

2005-02-02T07:30:00.000+03:30

I haven’t even been here for a week yet, in some ways it feels like I have been here for months.

I am about finished reading my book on VBA for Access. Does that enable me to take over the development of these databases? Unfortunately not. However, my understanding of Access has increased.

Today when we got home, the guard who was visibly excited gestured for us to follow him. He took us to the kitchen were a surprise awaited us. All the stoves were lit like birthday cakes (we hadn’t had gas for a while because the pipes were frozen). We laughed and cheered. On top of that, we had electricity (without generator) and running water. The simple pleasures of life… To be frank, the discomfort we experience here does not bother me. I don’t think that electricity, running water, gas, heating contribute as much to happiness as most people claim it does. I never understood why people are perfectly happy to live in rustic conditions during a camping holiday, but consider modern facilities as essential for the rest of the year. [Ironically, while I was writing this paragraph, the overhead light went dim several times which is usually a sign that we won’t have city electricity for very long.]

I had a brief look at the monthly security situation summary from ANSO (Afghanistan Non-Governmental Organization Security Office). It is not especially a reassuring reading. Considering that last January was a quiet month, the list of security incidents that have occurred through Afghanistan is not slim. Kabul was very quiet though. The report notes “The country is observing a lull in security incidents due to seasonal, severe weather conditions.” I don’t know that we should look forward to Spring so much.

Fine foods

2005-02-01T07:29:00.000+03:30

Tonight, I was in mood to treat myself with the finest food money can buy in the immediate vicinity of my house. I walked carefully (so as not to slip on the ice) on a street that was solely lit by the stores’ gas lights until I reached a wooden cart selling the local delicacy: french fries, a hardboiled egg and halal sausage wrapped in a naan sandwich and flavored with curry powder ($0.2).

One man, dressed in rwipped clothes was busy collecting fries by sweeping the greasy counter with his hand. He wrapped a piece of naan around the fries and others ingredients (the whole thing looked somewhat like a burrito), then he wrapped a strip of old newspaper around it and hand it over to me.

While he was doing that, his partner – who was infinitely amused at the fact that I wanted to buy something from them - was deep frying fries in a dark brown bubbly mixture, only one foot above the pavement that carried all the remains of a market day.

I dare say: if we were in the US, I do not think this business would receive the approval of the department of health. However, it compares advantageously to Mc Donald in both taste and healthiness. Kabul is one of the few capitals where there is no Mc Donald, although, I have been told that there is a Wendy inside the American military base.

For lunch, I eat at my work’s cantina everyday. While the food there is not very good, I love this type of food and the way of eating it: stews with lamb, chicken and/or chickpeas, eaten with naan bread (they tear a piece of naan, then use to grab food off the plate). Today, the waiter brought me a spoon and a fork because I was a foreigner. I was a little offended, but I reminded myself he was just trying to be nice.

2005-01-31T08:54:00.000+03:30

Today was my first day at work. As usually in those circumstances, I did not do anything productive. I met with my two bosses who seem very kind (of course, I’ve got to say that in case they ever read this, but it is actually true). My direct supervisor is younger than me (first time that happens to me).

I was again taken on a tour of the facility to meet everybody. That took a while, not only because there are a lot of people in this organization but also because Afghans are heavily into the whole greeting thing. It is possible for two men to greet one another for several minutes. It is purely traditional because they talk at the same time and therefore cannot understand each other. It is also tricky because men are not supposed to shake hands with women (so I have been told) although they typically do shake hands with others men. Many times we have been asked to sit down for a tea, but this is a ritual invitation that one should refuse. After the tour, we went for lunch. It is a local tradition in Afghanistan to eat at one’s workplace and DACAAR has a cantina that serves all its employees. Food is ok and it is one less thing to worry about. I should add that I haven’t had even as much as an upset stomach since I have been in Kabul.

The main topic of conversation is the weather. Everything freezes: the road, the water pipes, the gas pipes, etc. With the electricity being down also, that leaves little facilities that work. I was upset at myself for having burned my sleeve while playing with the bukhari (furnace), then I realized that everybody in the house did the same thing. Last night the temperature reached -18C and five people froze to death.

I found a radio station (in French) that broadcast the news daily. I have yet to see any place where it is possible to buy a foreign paper (and the cost would probably be prohibitive).

I am getting quite nervous about my work. I will have to immerse myself deeply into Access and VBA. I know VBscript (sort of) but my knowledge of Access is largely restricted to using it as a back-end for a website. There is a lot I need to learn. Luckily I brought the appropriate books with me. As a result, even though I am dying to start learning Dari (DACAAR will provide us with a teacher), I decided to wait a little and catch up with some computer skills in the meantime.

I should say regarding the security that we don’t really stand out on the road because we travel with unmarked local vehicles (and not big-ass white 4x4 marked UN). Furthermore, the consensus among Afghans was that I could pass (one even claimed that I resemble a local pop singer. I’ll have to check it out to see how ugly he is).

2nd day in Kabul

2005-01-30T08:48:00.000+03:30

Woke up late today. Spent several hours with Lyn who showed me the city. I took her for lunch. We went to carpet street and flower street, two of the merchant areas. Pirated dvds are for sales everywhere. They cost around $2 a piece (but factor in that many don’t work).

I am tired of expensive restaurants for expats already and I want to try some street foods next. One of the local delicacy: French fries with onion wrapped in a naan.

D Day + 2 To Kabul once again

2005-01-28T08:47:00.000+03:30

Woke up after 14 hours of sleep. I had breakfast in the hotel’s restaurant, next to a man who looked exactly (especially his size and voice) to Marlon Brando in the Godfather (part III).

My Turkish is slowly coming back to me. Amazing what a good night of sleep can accomplish.

In most places, I don’t find that Istanbul has changed that much. Sure, there are ATM and cell phones everywhere now and rather less beggars (though there is certainly no shortage of them). One neighbourhood that did change on the other hand was Cihangir (or at least the part of Cihangir where I used to leave). I went to see the street where I used to live. It has change so much that I am not sure I even recognized the street. It used to be made out of dilapidated houses, inhabited by peasants new to the city. In the winter, there was a permanent fog caused by people heating with low quality coal. The air is clean now and nearby there are western looking stores.

I went to do all the tourist things for the rest of the day. Taksim, Eminonu, the Egyptian Bazaar, the grand Bazaar, Istanbul University, Sulthan Ahmet most, Aya Sophia, etc.

My travelling skills are rusty. When visiting Sulthan Ahmet mosk, I coudn’t get rid of a guide. When I did, he tried to extort $35 out of me. I gave him five liras ($2.5) and told him to bugger off.

Upset stomach caused me to rush to the nearby public toilets (not for the faint of heart) where customers mistook me for the cleaner (proof that in the right context, I can pass as a Turk).

On the way to the airport I met Larry, a friendly guy who trains police officers in Afghanistan. From him and others people I have talked to while waiting for the plane in Kabul, I get the picture of the typical (non-NGO) expat: works for a company that contracts with the military, does it for the money, bored out of his skull in Kabul, capable to tell you about a murder that happened in the same tone of voice as if he announced the weather.

Many organizations used to refuse dealing with Ariana Afghan Airlines, due to their poor maintenance records. I am starting to understand why. Once at the airport, I learnt that the flight will only depart at 1:30am (two hours later than schedule). The plane itself is the shabbiest I have ever seen. Stewards wear worn-out uniforms. There are only two women in the plane. I feel that I am the only person in the plane who is actually excited about going to Kabul. The plane is also held in Baku for several hours.

Eventually I arrive. I am introduced to some of my colleagues by Lynn, one of the women I will be living with. Lynn striked me as a good-natured person with a generous heart and also somewhat of a party girl. Lynn and I will share a car. Driving here is no small endeavour (and the fact the car is a stick shift – which I never used – is the least of it). The Roads (if you can call them that) are full of enormous potholes, and covered with snow, ice and slush. As if this wasn’t enough, you also have to try to avoid cyclists and forthcoming traffic (even on a one way street).

The house where we live is fine, it is protected day and night by one or two guards (a standard measure for all expats here). The main challenge is the bitter cold of the afghan winter. It is quite cold outside and the house has no central heating. It is heated by bakharis, a furnace that uses either wood or sawdust as fuel. However the bakharis can only do so much. I am sitting next to one now and despite being warmly dressed I am cold. There is sometimes city electricity at night, however we also have a small generator that we can use (but the generator is not powerful enough to use an electric heater for instance).

The streets are full of carts from vendors of anything. Some collective taxis pass as well as big ass white UN vehicle with a large antenna. Oddly, there isn’t really any music played in the street (legacy of the Taliban?). The roads are so icy that women wearing burkas have to lift them over their head to look at the road.

We went to a French restaurant were we met others NGO workers. The place is enclosed and guarded by two men carrying an AK47, but already I am not paying attention to the weapons as they are everywhere. The restaurant is in a nice house, there is a swimming pool even for the summer. The restaurant is a place for expats obviously with the prices indicated in dollars. It is quite expensive.

The people we meet are interesting. The average expat seem to have spent 4-5 years outside his/her native country. I spent 11 but that does not really count because most of it was in cushy places (UK, US). It is very easy to meet others NGO workers here but I do hope that I will also get to meet Afghans (and not just because they are waiter in the restaurant I am at). I realized that I will life like an expat here. I always tried to live like a local before. Living like an expat is much easier but I don’t think it is as satisfying.

Some people imagine that because Kabul is “dangerous”, it must be scary and exciting. In fact it is neither. It’s not like we are dodging bullets here. It merely means that we need to follow some security guidelines, which is a hassle. Many organizations are stricter around security and set curfew, no-go area, etc. DACAAR (the organization I work for) set some general guidelines and leave it up to us to implement them or not.

D Day + 1 stuck in Istanbul

2005-01-27T08:46:00.000+03:30

My entire itinerary was Albuquerque-Chicago-Paris-Istanbul-Baku-Kabul over 48 hours. I made all the connection to Istanbul only to learn that the plane to Kabul was cancelled due to bad weather. Weather permitting I was to leave the next day. I suppose that there are worse things in life than to have to spend a day in Istanbul.

I did something I would never have done had I not an insanely heavy bag with me: I went to the hotel reservation desk in the airport and booked myself a room in an expensive ($50) hotel. But by that time beads of sweat were dripping from my forehead into the floor and I had already been travelling for more than 24 hours. All I wanted was a bed and a hot shower whatever the cost.

I used to live in Istanbul ten years ago and hadn’t been back since.

Inflation has been terrible: the highest banknote in circulation ten years ago does not even pay for a bus ticket today.

To my disappointment my Turkish seem to have almost entirely vanished.

After taking a shower I went for a walk. I meant to walk to Sulthan Ahmet, then Gulhane park and then to Eminonu. Instead, I walked the wrong direction and I ended up in Aksaray. That neighbourhood sure hasn’t changed much in ten years. Still the same street sellers of Chinese knock-offs, and the same “natachas” (Eastern European sex-workers). I got to Sultan Ahmet in the end but exhaustion caught up with me (I had barely slept the night before) and after sending some emails from a internet café (they are everywhere) I felt asleep.

D Day

2005-01-26T08:45:00.000+03:30

I went to the airport three hours early. An unpleasant American Airlines clerk made me take thirteen pounds off my eighty-three pounds duffle bag. I pleaded with him, I argued, I even offered to pay to no avail. I ended up carrying the extra weight in my hand luggage. I fail to understand the point of all this, since, whether it is in the cockpit or in the luggage department, the plane will carry this weight regardless. Bureaucracy is not designed to make sense.

I was worried that airport security would give me a hard time due to the fact that I was travelling to Afghanistan on a one-way ticket. Actually, nobody looked at my passport nor at my ticket closely enough to notice where I was going.

2005-01-25T10:46:00.000+03:30

"You are going WHERE?" That was the most common reaction I got from people when I told them about my intention to work in Afghanistan. Some of my smart-ass friends were more sarcastic: "Why Kabul? Was Falluhah already taken?"

Some never understood why I wanted to work for a Non-Governmental Organization for a pityful salary in a war zone.However, as a whole, I have been absolutely amaized by the support I received from family, colleages and friends, who made my departure possible by volunteering to keep my dogs, sell my car, etc.

During the week prior to my departure, I had several farewell parties organized for me. It was really rather nice.

Most everybody was worried about me and my departure, except me. Perhaps I was just too absorbed in getting everything ready for the trip (getting vaccinations, stocking one year supply of prescription medicine, obtaining my visa, etc.) It may seem like little but everyday I found some new errands that I must imperatively do before my departure.

I am having some second thoughts about writing a blog. The world sure does not need another mediocre piece of self-indulgent writing (which seem to characterize most blogs I have seen).